One thing that can be said about human beings is that we all want to feel good. This need is something that can enhance one’s life, and at the same time, it can also create problems. It can cause someone to grow and to evolve, and it can also cause them to stay stuck or to regress.

For example, pain can be used in such a way that will allow one to be propelled forward in life. And through this, there is the chance that they will feel better. This could be the result of them changing where they live, a relationship or their career for instance.

But at the same time, one could end up feeling better by avoiding the pain that they feel. Here, one could development a pattern of avoidance and then end up: over eating, using drugs or drinking too much alcohol amongst other things.

Black And White

And this is not to say that one person will always channel their pain into something constructive and other will always end up numbing their pain through some kind of escapism. It is not that black and white.

It will depend on many factors; as to what defines whether someone embraces their pain or not. As while human beings are creatures of habit, there are always exceptions.


However, in order for someone to feel certain way in the first place, their mind will have needed to have made a certain interpretation. Said another way - how one interprets what happens will play a big part in how they feel.

Of course no one is their own island and we are all affected by what happens around us. This is part of having empathy and having the ability feel. But this doesn’t mean that how one feels is therefore completely defined by what is happening externally.

Personal Reality

Each and every one of us has their own personal reality. There are some things that we can all relate to, such as the planet we live on, the laws of the universe and other such things. But with these things aside, we are all having our own unique experience here.

Most human beings, especially in the west, are working with the same ‘ingredients; metaphorically speaking. But when it comes how many of them are used and quantity of each one that is used, it is something that varies from person to person.


For example, everyone on this planet has the potential to feel depressed. And some people will be all too familiar with depression, whereas others might have only experienced it a few times in their life.

Other people might be familiar with what it feels like to feel appreciated and loved, whereas other people could wonder what’s it is like. This doesn’t mean that they can’t create a life where this is the case; it is just that these ‘ingredients’ are yet to be utilised.


So when it comes to how one feels, as a result of how they have interpreted something, there are going to be different factors involved. There will be what has taken place and there will be the meaning that their mind adds to what has taken place.

This meaning can be taken from what is currently going on in their life, what their childhood was like and what the people around them come up with. And while these sources can define what something means, there is the chance that they have no relevance to what has taken place.

Feeling Good Or Feeling Bad?

Not only will ones interpretations define how they feel, they will also define how they behave. And this shows how much of an impact they can have on someone’s life. Let’s say that someone contacts a friend and doesn’t hear back from them for a few days.

This could be interpreted to mean that they don’t want to talk to them. Based on this interpretation, one could feel: ignored, rejected and/or abandoned. When in reality, it could be nothing personal and simply reflect what is going on in the other person’s life.

Another example could be when someone experiences the end of a relationship or something else comes to an end in their life. One might naturally come to the conclusion that their life is about to get worse and feel a certain way because of it.

But at the same time, it could also be a sign that one is going to attract someone who is a better match, or that one is moving into direction that is better suited for them.


On one side, there is the fact that the mind doesn’t know everything. And just because a certain interpretation is made, it doesn’t mean that it is accurate. This is why ones intuition is so important when it comes to knowing what is going on.

And on the other side is the fact that, although ones interpretations could be wrong, as they influence how one feels and therefore how they behave, they are going have an impact on one’s personal reality.


So with this in mind, one thing that one can do to alter how they feel and behave, is to pay attention to how they are interpreting what is going on in their life. And if an interpretation is causing them to feel down or disempowered, then perhaps it would be better for them to change the meaning they have created.

Another thing that can cause one to form interpretations that are ‘negative’ or disempowering, are when someone has trapped emotions in their body. These interpretations are then being supported by what is going on in their body and not just what is taking place in their mind.

In this case, it will be important for one to release the trapped emotions from their body and as this takes place, the tendency to interpreted things in a ‘negative’ way will begin to subside. And this can be done with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

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