When one comes across someone who is successful, it can be easy for them to come to the conclusion that they have always been this way. And this is partly because one is not going to be aware of what they had to go through to get to where they are.

One could assume that this person has always experienced life in the same way or that the other person is ‘lucky’. This can then lead to the impression that this person and anyone else who is successful for that matter is different or ‘special’.

Yet while the mind can create all kinds of ideas, it doesn’t mean that these ideas reflect reality. What is taking place in one’s mind could match up with reality but at the same time, it might not.

A House

If one was to drive or walk by a house, they would see that at one point in time, this house didn’t exist. Through looking closely, one will see that the house is made up of many different materials.

The foundations had to go in and then brick after brick would have been laid. Now, if one hadn’t seen this process take place and just saw the end product, they could believe that the house just appeared. In most cases though, an adult is going to realise that the house didn’t just appear and that it had to be built.


During those moments when one is building their own empire or developing a certain skill, and placing one brick on top of another so to speak, it is likely to take place without many people knowing. However, once they reach a certain point, this may soon change.

The kind of attention they receive can depend on what they are developing. If one was to make it as a sports star for instance, they would receive more attention than if one was to make it as a builder.


It would be easy to believe that a sports star is more important than a builder or someone else who is not glorified in the same way. The most important thing is that one works on what matters to them and what fulfils their own needs, and not on whether other people will approve of what they do.

This is not easy to do, especially if one has a strong need for approval and wants others to acknowledge them. To be seen and accepted is something that every human being desires at some level, but it is not going to be possible for one to be seen and accepted by everyone.

Different Paths

Some people are going to be successful in areas that won’t bring them wide range exposure and not many people will know about it. And then there will be others who end up on the front page of a magazine or on a stage, for example.

How valuable something is doesn’t depend on how many people are drawn to it, what matters is that one follows their own truth. And if they feel the need for everyone to see and accept them, then this could mean that they have some unmet childhood needs to grieve and that they need to be affirmed for who they are.

Delaying Gratification

After seeing someone who is successful, one can wonder how they could ever achieve the same level of success in their own life and end feeling overwhelmed. Another part of them might wonder why they have to work for it and why they can’t have want they want straight away.

This would be the childlike part of them or their inner child, and this part of them is unable to delay gratification. At times, it will be important for one to have what they want but when it comes to success, delaying gratification will be vital.

A Process

If one is hungry for instance, they can go and buy something to eat, but if one wants to develop a skill, they can’t go and buy the skill. In order to develop this skill, one will need to take consistent action.

One is then engaging in a process, and if one continues with this process and doesn’t stop, they will gradually develop a skill or achieve a goal. This doesn’t mean that one has to spend ever minute of their day doing the same thing; what it means is that one finds the time each day to focus on what matters in their life.

A Seed

No matter what someone is good at or what they have achieved in life, there would have been a time when their life was radically different. The actions that they took each day were a reflection of their commitment.

And like a seed that will grow as long as it is given the right nutrients, their daily actions allowed their dreams to become a reality. One not only had a vision, they also took the actions needed to that make their vision appear.


In the beginning, one might believe that their actions are not making a difference and this is when it will be important for one to focus on what matters. To keep in mind at all times that they are laying down the foundations and as they continue to take incremental action, they are putting one brick on top of another.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

To find out more go to - http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/

Feel free to join the Facebook Group -