If Worrying Were a Currency, You'd All Be Rich!

You all do it! Worry, that is. You all entertain those thoughts, images, or emotions, usually negative in nature, about some potential catastrophe that might happen (although it rarely ever does). You actually think that by “worrying” you might prevent whatever it is from happening. Guess what? It won’t! Worrying won’t do a thing except maybe cause breakouts, lack of sleep, stomach problems, anxiety, maybe even panic attacks. So why worry so much?

In some cases, worrying is associated with caring. “If I worry, it means I care; it’s not a bad thing!” I’ve actually had someone say that to me. Worrying might also be perceived as a way to stop the threat of the potential THING from happening. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. Here’s an example: suppose your son texts you at 2:00 a.m. to tell you he is on his way home. When he calls, he's at a bar and has had a few too many. Now you’re up worrying because it’s 2:30 a.m. and he’s still not home. You’re worried sick. You toss and turn and imagine the worst scenarios. Can you change anything? Can you make him get home safely? Can you be sure he won’t crash? The answer, of course, is no. I know that as a parent it's nearly impossible to stop seeing the imagined crash in your mind. But believe me when I tell you, no matter how many crashes you imagine, it's not going to change a thing. Most crashes won't happen, and if a crash does occur, you'll have to deal with it and no amount of worrying will prepare you.

If you're worrying about things you have to get done, and you think that by worrying you won’t forget them, then again, you’re wasting precious time, not to mention, risking an ulcer.

So what can you do to stop the Worry Frenzy?

1) Ask yourself, Does the problem about which I’m worried have a solution? If not, set the worry aside.

2) Stay in the Now. Usually worrying is about something that might happen in the future. When or if the Thing happens, you’ll know exactly what to do.

3) Write things down. Get them out of your head; that way you can be free to deal with present time, and assure yourself that you won’t forget whatever it is you need to do.

4) If you must worry, set aside some time. Decide you’ll worry for the next 10 minutes, and then be done. Whatever happens, happens.

5) Stop playing the What If game. You can ask What If about almost anything. So much wasted energy. You can actually make yourself crazy.

6) Stay away from Drama Queens; they tend to add fuel to the fire; it’s fun for them.

If there is something that you can do about a possible impending thing, then do it. You don’t need to worry, just take an action. Work on solving whatever the problem is; that’s more effective than worrying. If there’s nothing you can do, then why worry?