How to Move on From a Relationship

Many relationships that end do not end with a clean break. Feelings of loneliness and regret, and questions like “What do I do now,” and “Did I make the right decision”? often linger for quite some time after the breakup. Regardless of the reason that you and your partner broke up, and regardless of who decided to break up with whom, all breakups are tough, and it will require some time to come to terms with your new “single” status and adjust to your new lifestyle. The other party may be able to move on from the relationship quicker than you are, which can actually make it more difficult to get over the relationship, than if you knew the other person was hurting as much as you are. However, there are some things you can do to help you move on from a relationship in an efficient, healthy manner.

Forgive
If your relationship ended because of infidelity, or on bad terms in general, forgiveness is in order. Forgiving the person (or yourself) for the act or behavior that led to the demise of your relationship does not excuse it, but rather, allows you to move on. Without forgiving the person or yourself, you will continue to hold onto the ill feelings you hold in regards to the relationship, which will prevent you from moving on, and beginning another healthy relationship. In order to forgive the other person, you do not necessarily need to let him or her know you have done so through a phone call or personal visit, just forgive them within yourself and you will immediately feel a heavy weight lifted off of your shoulders.

Remember
Although it is wise to forgive your ex for past transgressions, you should not necessarily forget about what went wrong in the relationship if you really want to get over it. After a relationship has ended, it is natural to reminisce about all of the good times you had with your ex. However, it is critical that you remember the reason(s) why the relationship did not work out in order to truly move on from it. While you may have spent years of bliss together, that bliss could not withstand whatever made the two of you break up. Remember these events, and move on.

Change Your Focus
Rather than focusing on your past relationship, and dwelling on what could have been, change your focus to yourself. Take this opportunity to reevaluate your life and improve your life in general—not just in regards to your worth as a mate. Get a new hobby. Make an effort to be more active. Meet new people of the same sex. Getting out there and enjoying life, without focusing on a past relationship (or trying to find a new one) will make you a stronger, healthier person. Chances are, you may attract a new love once you have begun the process of focusing on yourself.