Recently, a client of mine called very upset about some bad news. A lucrative new government work project she believed was set to begin had just fallen through. It wasn’t her fault, the directors in Washington D.C. decided to put the project on hold. Convinced she would not have the cash flow to meet her kids’ tuition, she went into a hole filled with fear and a persistent loop of doomsday thoughts. I know what that’s like. I’ve been there, so for close to an hour, I talked to her about the importance of finding acceptance and disconnecting from her negative, dire thoughts.
I’d like to tell you what we discussed because something clicked for her—as it did for me when I first heard it--and it might help you: Act and live and think as if you have already achieved what you want. Liberating and empowering, isn’t it?
Create your own destiny
What a fantastic and simple concept. According to the law of attraction you create your own destiny by firmly believing in what you want to achieve, regardless of whether it makes sense today, regardless of whether you are anywhere close to your dream, and regardless of whether you feel that you can even achieve that dream.
In doing so, you put the entire energy of the universe behind you which then has no choice other than to act upon the "fact" that you've created the outcome for yourself. Which of course is not really a fact yet and won’t be until you believe it for real. You put out that energy that it is, and that energy comes back as a manifestation of the power of your thoughts, which are now a reality.
Act, live and think as if you have already achieved what you want
In creation and visualization, which is what the law of attraction is, we focus only on the good things, no word of the bad stuff. For my client, that meant rejecting her inner critic that harped about never getting a big client again, going deeper into debt, maybe even losing her house. Clearly time for a mental Intervention!
We talked about acceptance, which for me personally means the opposite of "refusal," its antonym. But, funny enough, it is important to add that both approaches work. There was a difficult point in my life when all I could do was refuse to accept that this was all there was for me. And in the end it wasn’t. I had to cling on to the refusal until I could accept that I would get from this tough spot to a better place. I mention both because we are all different. If you are a positive person you can accept and create more abundance right away. If you feel beaten down, then refuse to accept that this one thing will stick around forever. I am not sure why but “I am not this” works just as well as “I am this.” With a little practice you can let the negative go and focus on the positive.
Accepting yourself, or my client accepting the job loss (or her refusal to accept that this job loss would define her future), does not mean you or she have given up. It’s an important and continuing step in the growth process.
It Is What It Is
In order to find acceptance you have to figure out what "acceptance" means in your own reality. You understand that your life, your current situation – good or bad – is simply what it is. It has changed before and it will change again, many times for the better, and sometimes for the worse. Even if things are bad now, they will be better again! Finding happiness has a lot to do with accepting things as they are, here’s why: http://goo.gl/fyPZr
My client had heard similar ideas before, but she had forgotten something crucial: You can choose how you act, or react, toward the developments and changes in your life. They don’t have to paralyze you with fear or hopelessness. There is another option, another road to take that is much more pleasant and positive. It’s up to you and it all starts in your head--with the thoughts you choose to focus on.
In the end, my client discovered that these concepts really worked for her when she took them seriously. She made a conscious decision to reject the voice of her inner judge and take action to connect with new clients. Guess what? Yesterday her phone rang at 9:30 a.m. and it was a new client!
Beate Chelette is a respected career coach, consummate entrepreneur and founder of The Women’s Code, a unique guide to personal and career success that offers a new code of conduct for today’s business, private and digital world. Determined to build a community of women helping each other, after selling one of her companies, BeateWorks, to Bill Gates in 2006 for millions of dollars, Beate created The Women’s Code. In February 2012, to reach women everywhere, Beate launched The Women’s Code Online course. http://beatechelette.com/the-womens-code
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