When you meet someone you're attracted to, the goal (and hope) is they will be equally attracted to you and everything works out like it does in the movies, yes? The reality for most women – especially if you’ve been out of the dating loop for awhile – is you get nervous, tongue tied or end up ignoring him altogether – in case he notices how much you DO like him, right?

It’s not surprising this happens. The first, fleeting moment of attraction feels amazing THEN, your brain starts to go into overdrive and doubt about your looks, past hurt and vulnerability fly up in your face. On top of that, you’re SO attached to the outcome: you want him to be equally attracted and at the same time cracking open your dormant heart muscle to trust again.

This is all occurring in a split second and creating a feeling of deer in the headlights – not the most powerful place for creating attraction OR chemistry .

You may think chemistry is mysterious and elusive - impossible to pull out of thin air – and it just “happens”. It’s either there or not.

Today, I’m going to blow that theory right out of the water...

To demonstrate how easily you can create chemistry I’m going to use an example of my relationship with my housekeeper, Aleili. When I hired her I thought, “OK, this woman is going to be in my energy field as she cleans my home, how can I make this the best possible experience?”

Right from her first day, I made a point to appreciate everything she does. I never hold back on telling her how clean my place looks, what new clients I could send her and how much easier she makes my life. I’ve noticed over the last few weeks she keeps doing more than I ask – the other day I found her on all fours organizing my shoes – so great!

The minute she steps in my door, I’m creating chemistry with her. When you think about it, you’ve probably spent your whole life creating chemistry in different forms with everyone around you. Family, friends, colleagues and co-workers – maybe even your own housekeeper.

Now it’s just a matter of taking a skill you’ve been using in other parts of your life and applying it when you’re interacting with a man to create instant chemistry.

So let’s break it all down...


1) Activate Feminine Energy
Mr. Wonderful has just walked up to you and – bam! – you freeze. To get grounded and back in your body, simply take a breath. Allow silence to be there and let him step up to the plate to break the ice. Anchor into your softer, more relaxed and RECEIVING energy. If you start trying to be clever, witty or charming when you’re nervous – it generally goes in the opposite direction. Let him lead the way while you’re calming down. By the time it’s your turn to respond, you’ll be coming from a more relaxed, authentic place.

2) Appreciation
Just like I show appreciation every single time my housekeeper comes over, do the same when you meet a man. Long time readers have heard this from me a million times. So, if you’re new, all you’re doing is making a point to acknowledge any small thing a man produces for you (glass of water, pulling out your chair etc...)Men don’t hear acknowledgement from many women and this is guaranteed to give any man a warm fuzzy feeling all over – promise!

3) Use Touch
A gentle touch on his arm while you’re making a point, briefly brushing your arm against his or placing your other hand over his when you shake hands all send subtle, strong messages - creating a powerful, energetic connection. Animals do this all the time in the jungle – so take a cue from our furry friends and put it to use in the dating jungle.

Following my suggestions will act like the starter fuel to ignite feelings of attraction in a man and create instant chemistry. As a woman, you’re already naturally gifted with this skill. Now, it’s just a matter of transferring this into your love life!

Author's Bio: 

Kim Sarrasin is known as the Queen of Hearts and has one mission in life: To heal the hearts of women worldwide and end your suffering with men. Want to learn more about simple ways to attract your soulmate, have more fun dating and discover how you can get all your needs met? Then grab your FREE copy of her audio series "5 Essential Steps For Dating Success” http://www.queencoaching.com/lifecycles.html