How to Control Your Husband Without Him Knowing: How to Keep My Husband in My Control

Being married is a wonderful feeling but it comes with a lot of responsibility. Here are some ways to make sure that your man stays in control and never wavers to create any difficulties for you.

If you want to control him then don't start by "controlling" him
When you want to keep a man under control you have to make sure that you don't adopt the controlling attitude. The minute a man feel that his wife is trying to control him he will begin to defy her and hell will break loose.

Keep the pressure under check
While at times it becomes necessary to put pressure on the husband to get something done or to not do something; it becomes equally necessary to keep this pressure under check. Putting pressure on a man at all times will only force him to rebel against you.

Let him feel like he is still free in your relationship
Your husband needs to feel that he is not trapped in a maximum security prison when he married you. The strange thing is that the more free you make your husband feel, the more under control he will be. This is reverse psychology at its best.

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Make him feel like he wears the pants in the family
A man needs to feel all important and his ego demands that he feels like he wears the pants in the family. Consulting him when you take important decisions and respecting his judgment is crucial to this aspect. Once you have this area covered he will be in your control.

Be diplomatic when you want things done
You need to be diplomatic when you want to get things done and stay in control. The best way to do so is to make your man feel at times that though he is important, he is not altogether indispensable. Getting across this vibe nonchalantly will make you stay in control.

Become hotter as your marriage gets older
Another way to keep your marriage harmonious and your man under control is to work hard on the way you look. If you can manage to look hotter as your marriage gets older, your man will keep his interest alive in you and will stay in control.

Don't let the sex get boring and monotonous
Keep your sex life active and interesting. Don't get into the rut of boring sex as that sours a marriage and gets a man looking elsewhere. Keep the spark alive in your marriage by loving your man and keeping the sex interesting for him.

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Marriage is hard enough on its own. Even a good marriage is a bit of a struggle, because there is so much adjusting, bobbing, and weaving to do to keep it on track. It's almost like a cruise missile that's constantly adjusting itself to stay on track. That's what marriage is.

One of the skills that are probably the hardest to learn in a marriage or any relationship in the world is listening.

Listening is a tricky thing, because even when we think we're listening, we usually aren't. The next time you're in a conversation with anybody, if you can remember in the middle of the conversation, check yourself to see if you're actually listening to the conversation. Chances are that what's actually going on in your head is a bunch of internal dialog, most of it consisting of what you're going to say next.

We all do it. Of course you're going to at some point have to think about your answer, but the trick to learn is to start that process after your spouse (or kids, or whoever) is finished speaking. Listening is just that, listening. I tell my kids all the time when they start talking back, "two ears and one mouth for a reason"!

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I never realized that I was doing this to be honest until I had read it in Save the Marriage. In it he points out how not listening to your partner is a major marriage killer, and then it started to all make sense.

Here's how it usually happens with me.

My wife will be talking to me about something that bothers her, or something that's on her mind. Well, what happens very often is that right off the bat my mind will go into defense mode, and I'll start thinking of a valid argument to raise. So I'm doing everything but listen to her complaint.

But here's where the problem really lies. Many times I blow everything way out of proportion because while I was having my own little argument in my head. However now, since I have become aware of it from Save the Marriage [http://www.squidoo.com/save-my-marriage_today], and I truly listen, I am actually able to understand where my wife is coming from, and have actually found that more often than not I totally agree with her. In other we were on the same page all along. Go figure!

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Marriage is all about learning to roll with the punches. Newlywed couples quickly discover that with their wedding vows comes a lot of compromise and forgiveness. You have to be willing to put in the work to make your relationship successful. If you don't, it's destined for failure. When you begin to realize that you and your spouse aren't as connected as you once were, it's time to take quick action. The first step in doing that is to understand why couples drift apart and what you must do to change that. If you ignore this and hope that it will get better on its own, you're risking the future of your marriage.

There are several different reasons why couples drift apart. One of the main reasons is that their relationship changes once children enter the picture. It's amazingly gratifying to become parents. It enriches your life in ways you never imagined it could. However, unless you continue to nurture the relationship you share with your spouse, emotional distance is going to result. You have to spend quality one-on-one time alone with your partner even after you two become parents. Take advantage of family members who want to baby sit overnight for you and then use that time to reconnect with your spouse. It will not only improve your relationship with one another but it will create a stronger bond for the entire family too.

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Conflict is an unfortunate part of many marriages. When two people live together for many years, differences in their personalities and opinions are going to surface. Unless you two work at resolving your disagreements, there will be negative consequences. Learn to negotiate with your spouse so you two can clear the table and get rid of any lingering arguments. You don't want any resentment in your relationship. That will only cause the two of you to drift farther apart emotionally.

You must also never lose sight of why you married your partner. It's easy to stop appreciating your spouse when life's daily tasks take over. Take a few moments each day to tell your spouse how much you love them and need them. Thank them when they help you with things. Overlook those small negative habits they have that get under your skin. Instead, focus on the things you love most about them. If you both do that, the distance you may have been feeling will disappear and you two will be more connected than you've ever been before.

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Have you been struggling a little bit or a lot in your marriage and seeking some trustworthy Christian marriage advice? Well, as a fellow believer and married for 27 years I can tell you that nothing prepares you better for life's challenges and obstacles than prayer.

You see every marriage, including a Christian marriage, experiences peaks and valleys and what's important for the Christian married couple is what resources are used to help build a healthy strong marriage.

It doesn't matter if your marriage problems are big, small or you have none at all prayer can help you and your spouse have the best marriage possible (the one you desire and the one God wants to see). God doesn't want you to have a marriage where success is measured by avoiding divorce. God wants more for your marriage then just surviving and I'm sure you do as well.

I believe one of the most important pieces of advice for a Christian marriage is that couples keep God and prayer at the center of the marriage. There are many marriages that look perfect on the outside but if you could just take a look on the inside you would see pain, frustration, disappointment and uncertainty.

The good news is that God knows all of the issues going on in your marriage (big or small) and can answer your prayers for a happier and healthier marriage. God is ready and more than able to partner with you to have your marriage be as it was designed to be.

The way to get your marriage to be the way it is suppose to be is by praying everyday for your marriage and your spouse.

Here is an example of a simple prayer for a breakthrough in your marriage.

Lord, I commit our marriage into your hands. I pray that any feelings or hopelessness, anger, rejection or anything else that is negatively hurting our marriage is removed from our hearts. Please help us to be committed to each other break down any walls or barriers that we have built up that may be keeping us from having the marriage you designed and we desire.

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Help us to put our trust in you and have child like faith and believe that you are who you say you are and you will do what you say you will do.

Your word says "For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks the door will be opened".

God we are asking for your help to bring us closer to you and closer to each other. Father, we are seeking your guidance and strength to help us get through any marriage issues we are presently dealing with and the wisdom to avoid doing things that lead to problems in the future. We thank you for what you have done, what you are doing and the good things you have planned for our marriage and future.

The Bible says to "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path".

Conclusion:

The best Christian Marriage Advice I can give you is to simply ask God for help. God will do His part if you will do yours.

I hope this helps you in your marriage and if you need a little more Christian marriage advice I encourage you to take a look at "Save Your Christian Marriage". It's a quality Christian marriage resource founded on biblical principles to help you understand how to work God's plan into your marriage and life.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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