Do you ever have those days when you feel really down,tired, not motivated and just all around crappy about yourself?

I have found the common denominator for these feelings is usually the unkind way I treat myself. Sometimes I have goals that I do not reach and instead of focusing on things I have accomplished, I batter myself for hours and days about what I haven’t accomplished.

Can this ever increase motivation? NO, of course not. It just makes me feel worse about myself which makes me want to crawl into some hole and stuff myself full of the kind of food that reduces energy and then of course I feel even worse about myself , since I am not only angry and disappointed in myself for not reaching my original goal, I am now feeling disappointed in myself for binging.

It’s a cycle, a cycle I struggle with and I am sure millions of others struggle with.
All I can say is that in order to get out of the cycle we have to change one thing, only one thing to break that cycle.


I always start with being kind to myself.
YES, forgiveness, first and foremost I forgive myself.
I find for me the way to do this is to look at that little girl inside me and see her successes, there is always something, we are just usually too busy being down on ourselves to notice. So I find these things and congratulate her, I imagine how hard it must be for her having me around and that I if I was her mother I would be a very abusing one. For those of you who are parents, you know what motivates your kids, it’s the same thing that motives us. Love and encouragement. This way of thinking helps me to give myself some love, and also see the things that have been accomplished. I can let go of that disappointment and once I have done that, all of a sudden I start to feel lighter, happier and motivated.

So be kind to yourself it can only do good,never can it be destructive

Author's Bio: 

Roslyn Alper is a graduate of the Adler Institute in Life Coaching and has been coaching since 2011.

“Coaching is the beginning of an epic journey, firstly you work out your destination, build your road map, then learn to read and understand the signs in order to keep moving in the right direction, and so, the journey begins.”

Roslyn has been working with clients who are struggling to have a successful relationship, offering tools and support throughout.