I was watching Oprah the other day as she was interviewing Wynona Judd. Judd made a profound statement about losing weight and taking care of herself. She said that she had forgotten to put herself on her priority list. She also stated that now that she had finally made herself a priority she was happier, more peaceful and more confident than she had ever been.

If you’re a woman and especially if you’re a woman with children you know how hard it can be to make yourself a priority. We are literally taught that it’s more noble to put everyone else first and taking what is left over for ourselves. More often than not though, there is nothing left. As a result we become exhausted, overweight, depressed, angry and even resentful. All of this eventually turns to guilt because we believe that we’re doing a lousy job and everyone else seems to have it together so much better than we do.

As little girls we learned that we are to be pleasing and helpful. Not to mention that the happiness of our loved ones depends solely on our ability to love and care for them. Eventually this becomes our greatest sacrifice and we begin to trade our happiness for theirs. We become the good martyr acting as if our love for them is greater than our own needs and thinking erroneously that it should be. All the while in the back of our minds we have the belief and desire that some day, sooner than later, hopefully, that everyone will thank us for our sacrifices.

As a mother of grown children let me give you a heads up…you will never be thanked for your sacrifices!

Primarily because nobody realizes that you’re sacrificing anything. All that they see is that you are doing what you want to do because you want to do it. And if you tell them that you are sacrificing anything for their happiness they will be offended. Nobody, not our children nor our partners want to be responsible for our happiness, disappointment or sacrifice.

Get off the cross, we need the wood!

In other words your sacrifice serves no one. Not your family and certainly not you. Sacrificing always leads to resentment. Later when you want recognition for all you did and all you gave up, they will resent you right back.

Think about it for a moment. Do you really want to be a person that someone you love gave up their desires and needs for in order to make you happy? I’m betting you don’t. We simply cannot be nor do we want to be responsible for another’s happiness.

You must put you at the top of your priority list! Nobody can do it for you. What’s the worst that could happen? Your kids may develop some independence and as a result, greater self-confidence. Maybe your family will get to know you as the creative, joyful woman you used to be. Maybe you’ll laugh more together. You can have it all. You can even have it all, all at once…and the bonus NO GUILT!

Now is the time to finally put you at the top of your priority list. Are you so busy that you can’t see a way to have time for yourself? Are you afraid of what your family will say if you become a priority? I would love to help you redesign your life so that you can make time for you without taking anything away from your family. Register for your Radical Self Care package now.

How many more days, weeks, months or even years are you willing to live in exhaustion, anger, and resentment?

Author's Bio: 

I delight in teaching busy, overwhelmed and stressed women how to create 2-hours of “Me Time” every day without taking anything away from their family. Guiding women to make themselves a priority in their lives despite other obligations is my passion and my joy. I am the author of “Fall in Love…with your Self” self-hypnosis CD and “The 26 Hour Day” a free report. My website is www.WomanWithoutApology.com