Fill it up and SEAL IT with Confidence
Written by Ceil Hansen
As a Dating Coach, I have a very important job. It doesn’t come with a plainly written manual, nor a set of incongruent instructions. My job is to help another human being recreate their own destiny, re-invent their life, guide them through the process of transformation and individual growth, to help prepare them face the challenges of a tough Dating world.
If you feel you’re one of those who are ready to rock and roll, I gathered a list of things you can use to create your own personalized Dating Checklist to assess whether you truly are prepared to muddle with the other fishes in the Dating Pool.
I want you to date with more CONFIDENCE and boost your self-esteem so that you can go out and date more often and enjoy (and I mea
ENJOY) the Dating Process. Easier said than done.
Sure, you’ll soon realize that some things won’t take much effort on your part to modify, rectify or alter, while other idiosyncrasies might require a little bit of practice.
Bottom line is, if you don’t feel so great about yourself, no one will notice your inner and outer beauty. Feeling the energy from within will give your confidence a boost, so let’s start with some basics:
1. ARE YOU READY – The first and most important task we need to conquer is establishing whether you’re truly ready to meet someone new. If you are, we will proceed. If not, I recommend we give it some time.
2. LOOK WITHIN YOURSELF – Another tough one, but we have to do it. I’ll ask you to create a list addressing all the things you are NOT comfortable with about yourself. Be brutally honest.
3. LOOK OUTSIDE YOURSELF – You will make another list of things you think people may not like about you. The purpose of this exercise is to walk away from anything you don’t like and instill a positive mental attitude in everything you do, think, feel and act.
4. THE WAY YOU LOOK - Let’s address the way you look and the way you dress. We will work on learning to like and most importantly, LOVE yourself for who you are. You will not allow negative comments to influence you in any shape or form.
5. CHANGE - Accepting yourself is fine and dandy, but are there things you think you can do better? A sassier, sexier haircut? Less trips to Starbucks? By changing the most basic aspects of your looks, lifestyle and routine, you will be surprised at how good that will instantly make you feel. You are transforming into a new you. It is crucial to be comfortable with any changes you make.
6. GET HEALTHIER – You’ll need to condition your mind to be patient if you are dieting or exercising, as these changes will take a little while. Your confidence will grow as you feel better about yourself.Trust me, others will sense it.
7. CREATE NEW ROUTINES - Make a concerted effort to start to change the routines that drag you down. If you associate with people who criticize you, lose them fast. NOW.
8. THINGS YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO DO – Start doing the things you wish you had always had the courage to do, like a hobby, sport or volunteer work. Stretch your limits. You are a new (and improved) version of YOU.
9. ENJOY THE SIMPLE THINGS IN LIFE – Learn to enjoy the smaller things in life and give yourself time specifically for these things. If you’ve always wanted to cook a nice candlelight dinner for friends, start hosting dinner parties. If you’re used to waiting for others to invite you out, try to reach out this time.
10. STOP ACCEPTING SECOND BEST - Start making yourself the #1 priority. When you start looking, thinking and feeling good about yourself, your life will begin to change for the better and your confidence level shoots up.
11. IT’S OKAY TO BE SELECTIVE – What kind of people do you want to surround yourself with? Express interest in other people. Be conscious about this exercise. The more people you show interest in, the higher your confidence levels. Make small talk with people you meet at the grocery’s checkout line, at the post office or even at the local cafeteria.
12. START DATING - If someone asks you out and you feel there is chemistry, go ahead and accept it. Nowadays, I hear my male clients confess that women DO take the initiative to ask them on a date. At the same token, be proactive and ask someone out. Just do it, and accept freely that some people will say no.
Keep in mind that it’s a numbers game. There will be people who will also say yes, so keep a realistic approach to dating. Look at every opportunity as a unique chance to show off your new YOU. Be your own best advocate.
13. LIFE GOALS - Let’s work together on setting your short and long-term life goals as well as your personalized Romantic Goals. Like attracts like. People are naturally attracted to driven and goal-orientated folks. Confidence breeds confidence. Stick with it and just keep going. Don’t go back to what there was before. There’s no use crying over spilled milk, so let’s create a new path and move on.
About the Author:
The Dating Coach (@DatingAftrDivrs) of http://www.SealTheDate.com in Los Angeles, CA helps single men and women all over the country find the love of their life by creating and unleashing a strong personal branding style that is magnetic, powerful and unforgettable.
The Dating Coach can be reached by Email at datingcoach [at] sealthedate [dot com] or by phone at 1-888-464-3464 Ext. 04351334
Article author
About the Author
Through her inspiring SEAL THE DATE coaching program, Ceil Hansen, a motivational speaker, published author, University educator, community leader and mentor has coached MEN and WOMEN find the person of their dreams.
The person from within, first and foremost, before anything else. Once their personal self-growth and transformation process is in place, she helps her Clients seal the deal with the person who can compliment the new, self-assured and confident person that they are.
She coaches you with an easy-to-use format, simple strategies and practical solutions to get you back on the Dating road so you can find the right mate for you. She teaches and encourages SEAL THE DATE dating optimization techniques and personal branding strategies that create an irresistible, magnetic attraction with the special man or woman in your life.
In recognition of her efforts as an out-of-the-box social change advocate and serial Entrepreneur, Ceil was awarded the prestigious HALL OF FAME Businesswoman of the Year Award by the University of Southern California and the National Association of Women Business Owners (NAWBO). Additionally, the Small Business Administration nominated Ceil among thousands of Los Angeles small business owners for her efforts in networking, marketing and helping other home based businesses in L.A. and its surrounding cities. In 2006, she was the recipient of the Home based Business Champion of the Year Award at its 25th Annual Small Business Awards.
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