One of the most important and powerful things a person can possess is good communication skills. Sure, everyone has communication skills, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they're used correctly and effectively. After all, our sophisticated ability to communicate is one of the main distinctions that differentiate us as humans from animals. Why not make the most of this skill, and use effective communication to get the results we want?
Interestingly, the words we say aren't the only things that are considered as a form of communication. Our body language plays a big role, too. Body language includes our facial expressions, postures and gestures, which can all be very revealing. Also, how we say things is just as important as what we say. Indeed, you can safely say that there is no way to avoid communicating with each other.
But what do communication skills have to do with divorce, you're probably wondering? Well, think of it this way: if you don't convey your message the way you meant to, this could be misunderstood by your spouse. Of course, we all know that misunderstandings can get blown out of proportion and cause major fights. Trust me, I've seen countless couples get divorced because of constant bickering, arguing, and fighting. I hope you now see the importance of having good communication skills in a marriage.
To help you further understand, I've compiled a list of communication do's and don'ts. I hope these suggestions help you improve your communication skills.
1. Don't keep on nagging. Nagging, to put it simply, can be very annoying. No one likes to listen to someone who's always complaining or scolding, so do your best to avoid this. Constant nagging can possibly turn into a big unnecessary fight.
2. Do stay on topic. When talking about a certain topic, don't relate it to previous experiences and events, especially those that you associate with feelings of hurt, anger, and negativity. This will only bring back issues that are not at all necessary, and will open up another issue aside from the current one.
3. Do learn to appreciate. Experience proves that your spouse will love it when he or she feels appreciated. Being appreciated will give him or her a feeling of importance, which is one of the ingredients to a good and lasting marriage. The problem with most people is that they get so used to being and doing things with each other that showing praise and appreciation hardly happens at all.
Truly, good communication skills are very important. They can go a long way towards making a marriage last, and they can also be very effective in keeping a simple divorce simple, and avoiding a costly legal battle.
To learn more about California divorce go to California Divorce Separation and sign up for the free guide.
Ed Sherman is the author of How to Do Your Own Divorce in California and the divorce expert attorney famous for founding Nolo Press and the self-help law movement. Since 1971, his books and software have saved divorcing couples BILLIONS of dollars in legal fees. He owns www.CaliforniaDivorceForms.org, where he provides comprehensive advice and tips on how to get the best possible California divorce.
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