Dear Dr. Romance,

I would like your advice in my relationship with my boyfriend. We have been living together for a year and a half and known each other for 3 years. He calls me names and puts me down when I try to communicate with him and every time i want to break it off he tells me we should try again but it seems to be going in a circle.

Dear Reader:

It sounds like nothing is changing in your relationship, so please understand that nothing is likely to change. You can't talk him into being a nicer guy. If he was a nice guy, he'd be treating you better. Pay attention to what your boyfriend does, not what he says. If his actions don't change, then he's not maturing, and you won't get anywhere with him. "Less Talk, More Action" will show you how to make sure he hears you.  It's time for a change.  "How to Avoid Loving a Jerk" will help you find a guy who's grown up enough to really care about you.  Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences can help you learn the relationship skills you need to understand a guy and create a successful relationship.

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For low-cost phone counseling, email me at

Author's Bio: 

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.