This article will give you an alternative perspective in how to deal with a traumatic challenge you cannot control. The basic point is when you don’t have the ability to avoid the challenge, you do have the ability to control how you deal with it. The simple fact of how you approach it determines the quality of your involvement in this struggle. Here are some important questions you have to consider. Of course, in the moment the challenge is before you, there isn’t time to think about the answers. If you consciously deal with these questions now, your responses will naturally manifest.
• Do you rely on your inner resources or do you assign responsibility to someone else? Of course, the experts like doctors are trained to deal with health issues, but do you participate as a partner with them? When inner and outer resources work together, the best results can happen.
• Do you have a goal for what is happening, even when you work with the experts? Having a personal goal will activate powerful inner resources to help you attain your goal. Without a goal, it is easy to become a passive victim.
• What is your priority when you focus on this struggle; your emotional reaction to it or the openness to work with the experts? Sometimes emotions like panic and fear are perfectly natural and that can affect how important it is to you; if that is your only focus you would be limited in your participation. It is important to step back, take conscious breaths and approach the situation with a clear perspective. This isn’t the natural response to traumatic struggles, but this can be consciously conditioned to happen.
When you develop skills and they become habits, that is what you fall back on when challenged. Your conscious breathing can become a habit, just as your past conditioning becomes a habit. Think about that; if you could choose the habits you fall back on, conscious breathing is a good alternative to your conditioned ego. This has been the goal of any spiritual way of life. It takes discipline, but just having that goal is a positive step forward.
When you value the benefits of a conscious breath, the habit gets stronger and it is easier to rely on it. Think of a professional fighter. You may not identify with this example, but it teaches a good lesson. Conscious habits make you a good fighter. If your challenge is dealing with a chronic illness, you are literally fighting for your life. Even when you are healthy, consciously dealing with any challenge can improve the quality of your life.

• Maybe the most important question; do you trust yourself? If you do, you will use your inner resources without self-doubt. We trust what is important to us, Even though this control is desperately needed when dealing with a struggle like poor health, we need it for every challenge we face. It is impossible to trust yourself when your thinking mind is more important than breathing.
Be calm, be cool and trust the miracle you live in.

Author's Bio: 

Marc Lerner has been a life skills coach for 25 years and has been working to empower patient participation, to improve the quality of life and to improve attitudes when facing challenges. Marc has had multiple sclerosis since 1981, which is an incurable disease. He had to tap inner resources to cope with his illness because he could not rely completely on help from medical professionals. Now, Marc teaches life skills, including ways to develop a positive self-image, confidence and self-trust. In 1982, Marc founded Life Skills Institute and served as its president to 2013. Through the Institute, he worked for 25 years at the VA with veterans with PTSD, cancer and AIDS patients and the mentally ill homeless. In 2002, Marc was named Outstanding American with Disabilities Business Person in Los Angeles.
Since 2008, Marc has focused on writing books. He has written The Positive Self: Change Your Self-Image and You Change Your Life, A Healthy Way to be Sick, The End: A Creative Way to Approach Death and A Poetic View of Hospice. All are available on Amazon/ To learn more about Marc and his work, go to his blog at