There are a number of feelings that can cause someone to engage in behaviour that is destructive. Rage is one of those feelings as is hate, with these being feelings that can be completely overpowering.

Therefore, due to what can take place when someone is experiencing one of these feelings, it can stop them from being able to think clearly. As a result of this, they can end up causing harm to someone or something.

Another Outcome

Conversely, they could end up experiencing one of these feelings and, instead of directing the energy that is within them outwards, they could push it down inside their own body. Now, this is likely to mean that they won’t harm another, but it could cause them to harm themselves.

This could mean that they will end up feeling down and depressed, and they may even end up with stomach problems. The weeks and months could then pass by and, out of nowhere, they could do something that is completely out of character.

In The Middle

Therefore, giving a feeling like this carte blanche is not the answer and neither is denying that it even exists. The ideal will be for one to contain this feeling and to look into what they need to do to deal with it.

Here, one won’t be controlled by it and they won’t try to control it either, giving them the ability to resolve what is going on. What they may find is that this is a feeling that has been triggered from their past, meaning that they will need to heal an old wound and/or it may mean that they will need to say something to another person and to assert their boundaries.

A Role Model

Through taking responsibility for how they feel, they will be serving the world and they will be serving themselves. This is because they won’t be adding more drama to the world and they won’t be undermining their own being.

Thanks to how they deal with their feelings, they will serve as a positive example to others. If they didn’t behave in this way, and they had the inclination to be controlled by their feelings or to deny their feelings altogether, they would be showing others an unhealthy way of dealing with feelings.

One Priority

So, if someone has a healthy relationship with their own emotions and is emotionally intelligent, they might end up trying to educate others on how to experience life in the same way. For example, they could be drawn to those that carry a lot of hate and try to encourage them to let go of how they are feeling.

This will then come from a place of understanding and a genuine desire to serve, as opposed to the need to shame and blame those that are in this position. In other words, they will generally embody a level of consciousness that will allow them to assist their fellow human beings.

A Different Energy

Someone like this is then going to be radically different to the individual who is hell-bent on removing hate, but who comes across as incredibly hateful themselves. They will say one thing, yet their behaviour will say something else entirely.

It will be as though they are so focused on what is going on for others that they are unable to see what is going on for themselves. Consequently, an outside observer will be able to see that they are carrying a lot of hate but they themselves will be oblivious to this fact.

Their Shadow

At this time, it won’t be possible for them to acknowledge what is taking place inside them. Owing to this, what they are unable to face inside them will end up being projected into others.

As what is taking place inside them will be placed into others, it will allow them to maintain the delusion they are not hateful; it is the people ‘out there’ who are. Trying to change others will be an indirect way for them to change themselves.

A Flawed Approach

However, as they are carrying a lot of hate inside themselves that they are unable to acknowledge, trying to change others won’t have much of an effect. Ultimately, unless they deal with their own baggage, they will continue to project their hate onto others and have a strong need to be around people who are hateful.

They won’t be able to see it, but they will have a level of consciousness that is very similar to the level that these people have, hence why they are judging them and are trying to change them. If they took a step back and no longer focused on the people who are like this, they may have to come face to face with the part of themselves that they have been running away from.

No More Running

What they may find is that they don’t feel comfortable their own hate and that this hate also allows them to avoid their own toxic shame. They may feel deeply powerless and helpless too.

The pain that is inside them may be the result of what has taken palace in their adult life and/or it may go back to what took place during their early years. Perhaps their early years were a time when they were often mistreated.


If their pain does relate to what someone did to them when they were a child, and they deal with this pain, they will no longer need to take this pain out on others. This will allow them to be the change they want to see in the world and to no longer feed into the drama of the world.

Adding more love to the world is, of course, one of the ways that the world will change, not by adding more hate. And as what is resisted is what will persist and grow, being for love, not being against hate, is undoubtedly the best way to be.

Author's Bio: 

Author, transformational writer, teacher and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, four hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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