It is possible to use one word to respond to this. However, it may come out so simplistic that the recipient is tempted to treat it with levity. Therefore, let us use some explanation here. Look at it this way. Knowledge is power is a popular dictum. Dating many people and, this is true of men also, would give a woman the opportunity to know the different variant of characteristics and to make a choice that is governed by knowledge and possibly wisdom of what she can tolerate.
Marriage relationship is one of the most challenging activities of human existence. It is fraught with difficulties, trials, temptations and all sorts of obstacles. In fact, many people have wondered whether it is worth it, given all that happens in that institution. To those who ask the question, we state that it is not just worth it, it is the only thing that matter in the life of man on earth.
All the opportunities for happiness in life and many of the drags on man’s ability to be happy are contained in the marriage institution. It is a Potpourri of both what is good and bad in life. A typical man or woman is not easily deciphered. We are wired to act both responsively and reactively. These two traits are capable of bringing peace happiness now and insanity and other dangers the next minute.
In the light of the above, it is advocated that dating before marriage is treated as critical so that all those wishing to get involved are able to understudy each other with a view to finding these traits and foibles that are tolerable. If, therefore, a woman goes on with one man and marries him without dating other men, she would not be acting with wisdom since she did not even give herself the opportunity to know that there is a difference and what that difference is.
It must be stated though that for dating to be successful, dating partners should establish or adopt a standard which must include respect for one another, moral or sexual purity – avoidance of premarital sex. The dating standards of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are the best that one can adopt.
Dating should be for a short period. Within three to six months, dating partners should have made a decision to move the relationship to the level of courtship or marriage or stopped seeing one another. To be able to make a dating decision in wisdom, a woman must be dating at least three to four guys simultaneously, during different days, of course.
The challenge that would be faced by women in doing this is the fact that inappropriate dating activities such sexual intercourse is taking place in modern day dating. It is wrong to conduct dating like marriage with such activities as giving gifts, buying clothes and dresses, renting apartment, paying school fees and sexual intercourse. These days, what you have is a debate of whether sexual intercourse should happen on the first date or second date. Many relationship experts already know that when sex happens during dating, it ruins the relationship. They, battling with acquiescence and societal acceptance, are advocating delaying the time when sexual intercourse occurs in a relationship. The volume of problems in the relationship world is a pointer that this position is not just faulty, it a cog in wheel of progress of a relationship. Instead of petting the issue and compounding the problem of the up and coming generation, why not tell them the truth that premarital sex would ruin their relationships and their lives. And this is true.
It is high time both men and women remove sexual intercourse from dating so that they would be free to practice in such a way that it would serve them. Dating is a critical source of information for decision making in this all impacting event of human life called marriage. Dating is a time to ask questions, questions and more questions. Asking questions is so important in dating that people are advised to go with a list of questions they could ask a dating partner and discreetly read and then ask those questions as if it is flowing naturally. With practice, people can ask these questions without reference to any piece of paper.
The feeling prevalent as this is being discussed is that there is a brick wall between people transiting to appropriate dating practices from what they are doing today. It is, however, important that we transit to the right because what is going on now is not doing anybody any good.
We see such situations as a dating partner getting jealous when he or she sees someone he or she has dated with another man or woman.
When we transit to courtship, this is a different ball game. This time, courtship is between two people only – a man and a woman - who has discovered that they could enjoy the other person’s qualities, enhance their strong areas and endure their frailties and have developed for that person, the tender feelings of love and that marriage is imminent in a few months’ time.
It is advocated here that when marriage is not imminent, dating should be for socialization and for keeps. Date people and stop dating them without incident and keep them in reserve for recourse and possible courtship in the future. When you date for socialization, you can go out with seven boys or girls for the seven days in a week. No string should be attached and of course, no sex should be involved. No gifts, no payment of rents, school fees or other obligation of financial nature. You could serve one another in non-financial ways such as helping with chores, school work or other ways that does involve control of the persons involved.

Author's Bio: 

Francis O. Nmeribe is a relationship expert, life coach, personal transformation teacher, an industrial security practitioner and author. He is the author of two bestselling books: “Foundation for Joyful Relationships” and “Growing From Your Experiences”. He contributes to the national and international dailies and magazines. Francis can be reached through www.successpublishers.com.ng, http://marryright.wordress.com. Email: successpublishersng@gmail.com