People targeted by a mobbing process have been thrown from what they believed was an orderly world into a state of chaos in which many former points of reference are no longer valid.

This confusion may prompt them to question all points of reference, including the ones deep inside of them. A person's sense of personal dignity can be compromised unless steps are taken to protect and preserve that which the individual values most.

One reason people don't act faster to save themselves from a mobbing situation has to do with attachments that they refuse to sever. All of us do this and we all have attachments that we have developed over the years. In times of stress these attachments can be a point of reference or stability or they can work against us. Without realizing it, we may become willing to sacrifice our inner balance and integrity for some of these attachments. Here are some examples:

· You may believe that your self worth is attached to your job.
· You may be attached to something at work that you have built.
· You may be attached to a group of coworkers that you think depend on you.
· You may be attached to the idea that you are the only one who can do something, fix something, or keep things stable.
· You may be attached to the belief that you have to protect others from the same treatment.
· You may be attached to the notion that the organization and its mission are more important than you are.
· You may be attached to resentment, anger, or fear.
· You may be attached to the desire for retaliation.

There are other attachments that are much more important. These may become compromised or weakened, while the other attachments become obsessive.

· Your health
· Your family
· Your ability to work
· Your peace of mind
· Your values
· Your identity

External concerns can cloud our vision of who we truly are and who we believe ourselves to be. If you have identified your worth and value with your accomplishments, your work, your status, your lifestyle, or any other external measure you are vulnerable to that identity being compromised by elements out of your control.

Though mobbing is hurtful, you do not have to allow it to destroy you. A situation may be something over which we have little control, yet we always control what we say, think, feel, and do about it. Evaluating and prioritizing our attachments is one way we can take action to help ourselves in any situation in which we find ourselves.

It is a good idea as we go through life to periodically identify and re-evaluate the attachments we have made, determine their validity in relation to our current experience, prioritize their value, and release ourselves from those attachments that no longer serve us. When we do this, our perspective can remain orderly within. We can maintain our inner balance regardless of how chaotic our outer lives may appear to be.

Anticipate a great day. Its Yours!


©2011 Gail Pursell Elliott All rights reserved. Food For Thought is part of the Dignity and Respect mission that is Innovations and is the intellectual property of Gail Pursell Elliott. Reprinting or re-distribution in any form for commercial use, including reproducing or displaying on your website, requires permission.

Author's Bio: 

Gail Pursell Elliott, “The Dignity and Respect Lady”, has over 20 years experience in middle and upper management, founded Innovations Training in 1998, and is author of several books including School Mobbing and Emotional Abuse and co-author of the book Mobbing: Emotional Abuse in the American Workplace. Gail trains managers and employees for corporations, associations and universities and is a featured speaker at conferences as well as a sought after media expert on workplace and school violence. Her weekly Food for Thought is read by people around the world.