This Valentine's Day, couples and individuals are looking to find and/or strengthen their love relationships. As award-winning authors and world-renowned relationship experts, Ariel & Shya Kane have discovered three simple, yet revolutionary tips for creating magical relationships, based on the idea that you don't need to "work on" your relationship in order to fix it. In their acclaimed best-seller How to Create a Magical Relationship, gold medal winner of the Nautilus Book Award, as well as its sequel How to Have A Match Made in Heaven, gold medal winner of the Mom’s Choice Award, people learn how to have a relationship that surpasses their dreams and discover how to recognize and bypass the pitfalls to having a happy and satisfying relationship. The Kanes also identify what defines a magical relationship and address other key issues such as dating, getting out of a relationship rut, how to stop arguing, and how to rekindle the spark in your relationship.

Here are Ariel & Shya’s Three Tips for Creating Magical Relationships:

Listen – Truly Listen:

When "true listening" is present, satisfying communication is sure to follow. But this is not something we have been taught growing up in our families, amongst our friends, or in school. True listening requires being in the moment and letting go of your point of view, your thoughts, and your agendas. True listening is an art. No two things can occupy the same space at the same time. In order to really listen to your partner, you have to let go of what you think, know and want to say, in order to really let the communication come in. Get interested in truly listening to your partner rather than listening to your thoughts about what he or she is saying and you will naturally create a magical relationship.

Be Kind to Yourself:

In our most private thoughts the majority of us are very hard on ourselves. We are our own harshest critics, finding fault with ourselves and thinking we should do our lives differently or better. This poses two distinct challenges in your love life: First anyone who find you attractive has a major strike against him or her for finding you attractive with all of your "faults" – He or she must be deficient or at very least have bad taste and judgment! This misconception sets you up to start unwittingly looking for what is "wrong" with anyone who is interested. The second challenge happens once someone is in relationship with you. By extension you will treat him or her as you treat yourself in your thoughts. So if you are out to fix your shortcomings, your partner is destined to be your next "fixer-upper" project. If you are kind to yourself you are far more likely to be kind to your partner, which will have your relationship grow long after love's first blush.

Working on Your Relationship Really Doesn't Work:

Have you noticed that if there is something about your partner you don't like or have tried to change, the more you have worked to change him or her, the more he or she has persisted in staying the same? Eventually, your disagreements with your partner dominate your life and your relationship until they are your only focus. But simple awareness, a non-judgmental seeing, is enough to dissolve the greatest of challenges between a couple. How? Well, neutrally observing something doesn't add energy to it – for or against – and everything in this universe needs energy to survive. If you don't energize your habits or your partner's, they will naturally dwindle and die away all on their own.

Author's Bio: 

Since 1987, internationally acclaimed authors, seminar leaders, and business consultants Ariel and Shya Kane have taught individuals, couples and organizations across the globe how to live in the moment and unwire the knee-jerk behaviors that get in the way of living life with ease. Together for 30 years and counting, people still ask Ariel and Shya if they are on their honeymoon. To find out more about the Kanes, their books, videos & seminars, visit:

The Kanes' newest book "How to Have A Match Made in Heaven: A Transformational Approach to Dating, Relating and Marriage" has won numerous awards, including the Mom's Choice Award Gold Medal, and is now available in English, Spanish and German. Learn more at