Anxiety: Can Unmet Developmental Needs Play A Part In Why Someone Feels Anxious?

There are those who experience anxiety from time to time and those who more or less always feel anxious. When someone can relate to the latter, they might want to lose the ability to be anxious.

This may show that they have experienced life in this for a few months or a number of years. But, regardless of how long their life has been this way for, they will be desperate for their life to change.

Too Much To Handle

It might not matter where they are as they could have the tendency to feel edgy and unstable. So, when they are at work, with friends and at home, they might rarely feel at ease.

This is likely to make it hard for them to perform at their best at work, to fully show up around their friends and to recharge at home. Ultimately, being, this way is going to make it hard for them to enjoy their time on this planet.

The Other Side

Every now and then, they could end up feeling totally burned out and exhausted. If so, this could mean that they will find it hard to get out of bed and do just about anything.

As a result of this, they could often have time off work, cancel a get together with a friend or a family member, and put off things that they need to do at home. Things can then build up, which can cause them to feel even more unsettled.

Reaching Out

After suffering for however long, they could end up reaching out for support. This could be a time when they will speak to their doctor about what is going on for them and how long it has been going on.

Consequently, they could up being put on medication and/or referred to a therapist and encouraged to meditate. What is going on up top, so to speak, is then going to be the area of focus.

The Issue

Their thoughts, beliefs and behaviour are then going to be seen as what is causing them to experience life in this way. So, by changing their thoughts, beliefs and behaviour, they will gradually be able to settle down.

After the days, weeks and months pass, they may be able to settle down and be able to function at their best. Then again, this might not work or it might only work for a little while.

A Natural Outcome

If this approach doesn’t lead to their desired outcome, it could show that this is because there is far more to what is going on than them just having ‘negative’ thoughts, for instance. Yet, as they are likely to live in a society that is very mind-centric, it is not going to be a surprise that what is going on at a deeper level is not explored.

This is likely to be a society that is full of people who are emotionally disconnected and live on the surface of themselves. The approaches that are used to deal with ‘mental health’ issues are then going to largely reflect this

Going Deeper

If there is far more to what is going on than them just having ‘negative’ thoughts, it could show that they are carrying repressed pain and unmet development needs. But, as this pain and these needs will be outside of their conscious awareness, this is not something that they will realise.

Still, what is taking place at a deeper level will have an effect on how they perceive reality and what they look for from others. Considering this, there is a chance that their early years were not very nurturing, and that this was a time when they were often traumatised and deprived of what they needed.

Back In Time

Throughout this stage of their life, they might have often been physically harmed, put down and left. This would have caused them to be overwhelmed, and for their brain to automatically repress how they felt and to go into a disconnected and shut down state.

The other part of this is that their need to be loved, held, seen, heard, touched, and protected, among other things, would have seldom if ever been met. But, as they were powerless and totally dependent at this stage of their life, there was absolutely nothing that they could do about what was going on.

Stuck In The Past

Now, many, many years will have passed since this stage of their life, but they won’t have truly moved on. A big part of them will still perceive life in the same way and will continue to look for someone to meet their unmet development needs.

Therefore, simply changing what is going on in their mind won’t deal with their repressed pain or their unmet development needs. At best, focusing on their mind will just push down the inner material that is trying to break through to their conscious awareness in order to be acknowledged, worked through and allow them to become a more integrated human being.

Awareness

If someone can relate to this and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.