This article is about the consequence of imitating others.

The ancient Persian poet, Rumi, wrote “The Donkey” (translated by Coleman Barks). The poem describes a weary traveler, his servant, and donkey, who stop at an inn to spend the night. But, the innkeepers are poor so they steal the donkey and sell it to buy food. They prepare a feast for themselves and the traveler. The hosts dance and sing because they are happy to have food. They are not afraid to act how they feel. After the meal, they continue singing and drinking. The weary traveler, imitating the hosts, sings along and pretends to feel happy. When the hosts sing: "your donkey is gone my friend, your donkey is gone," he sings louder than all.

Daybreak comes and the traveler sends his servant for his donkey. The servant looks confused. “They sold your donkey. I thought you knew. You were singing louder than anyone else.”

Have you ever imitated the happiness of friends or others only to find out later it was at your expense?

* Let another’s happiness be theirs.

* Look upon their happiness as a privileged guest.

* Fight the urge to pretend you are feeling what they feel.

* Don't pretend something in hopes that you you will fit in or be liked. Everyone knows when that happens. We don’t fool anyone but ourselves.

* Make up your mind to cherish your decisions, interests, intuitions, and choices.

*For once in your life, know where your donkey is.

*Don't depend on others to take care of it for you.

Whose song are you singing? If it’s not yours, make up a different verse. The world is waiting to hear your song.

Author's Bio: 

Dr Brawley is a Buddhist-minded psychotherapist and writer and teaches university level psychology courses.