Here’s a question with a lot of mystery to it, because the answer seems so obvious at first. Of course I want to be me; or I am me already, whaddya mean who do I want to be?

I have to admit that for years, as a young boy, a teenager, a young and then a middle-aged man I yearned to be like others whom I believed were better in some way. This was not usually a conscious yearning, but I realize that by my dysfunctional behaviour I was suppressing my own authenticity and attempting to fit myself into uncomfortable roles or mimicking the actions of those I thought were successful human beings.

Let’s see – who are some of the people I’ve been? In earlier days, John Wayne, Frank Sinatra, Johnny Weismuller (who played Tarzan), my teacher Mr. Price, Queen Boadicea, Hamlet, my Great-Grandfather Isaac Bender. I failed at all of them. Later I was Gandhi, President Kennedy, James Bond, Ernest Hemingway, my friend and colleague Sidney Bunt, my Great-Grandfather. I failed at all of them, but allowed parts to seep in and began to have an inkling of the qualities that mattered to me. Later still, I was Richard Branson, my teacher and friend Eugene Heimler, Steven Covey, my Great-Grandfather. I failed at all of them, except that now I became clearer that it was no longer those men, but what they represented that was important to me.

Thanks to all of them, and to the many, many more of you out there, who have been a mirror for me. It’s my 67th birthday this week and I am growing up to be me at last. What a success that feels!

In Peace

Warren Redman

Author's Bio: 

Warren Redman trained in the UK as a psychotherapist, facilitator and coach and has developed his own unique style of Emotional Fitness Coaching. He is president of the Emotional Fitness Institute (formally the Centre for Inner Balancing), writing about, teaching and coaching people in Emotional Fitness. He is the author of fifteen books, including the Award-winning The 9 steps to Emotional Fitness, Achieving Personal Success and Recipes for Inner Peace.

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