Doing aura readings for clients, especially when I facilitate cutting cords of attachment, a client will sometimes want me to comment on a love relationship.

"Is he The One?"

Or "Why did I fall for him, anyway? Whatever deluded me into thinking that he was my soul mate."

Here's what the hype vendors won't tell you:

•There is more than one model on earth for human happiness and evolution.
•The number of people who are meant to evolve through the fabled "soul mate relationship" is really quite small.
•And for good reason.


You see him or her and time stops. A clap of thunder, a bolt of electricity, a shivery feeling of familiarity deep in your belly or some other beloved body part. Destiny sounds, loudly, as if pounding on the front door.

I hear stories like this sometimes. Usually, alas, those stories lack happy endings.

According to myth, big drama during the attaction phase signals perfection. Sure, sometimes this happens. And sometimes the relationship actually seems to fit that "soul mate" stereotype. But next time you hear someone proclaim that love at first sight is the one and only way to be happy, consider the source.

What is that person trying to sell?

•Is it clothing or grooming products so you'll look picture perfect when you meet?
•Is it dating services or psychic readings or some other way to help you finish your dawdling, hurry up already, and find The One?
•Maybe it's a movie. We humans do love myths and drama.
•Could be a drunken reverie.
•Perhaps you're hearing fantasy talk from someone who doesn't take much responsibility for his/her life.
•Or it could even be a walking nightmare, nicely dressed.

That last example happened to an Energy Spirituality client I worked with yesterday. "Claudia" saw "Jim" across a crowded room and, soon as their eyes met, they rode a wave of electricity as unmistakable as the wave pool in an amusement park.

Claudia is a super-evolved, loving, generous and successful professional healer. Jim, it turned out, had a huge need to pull energy out of Claudia and, later, try to take her for every cent she was worth.

Sometimes it works out more nicely but, again, consider the reporting source. On my last plane trip from Tokyo (the short return voyage, merely 11 hours, not 14), my seat mate was "Polly." Soon into our flight, and the first of her many glasses of wine, Polly told me about her four-year relationship with her soul mate. He died young. Before then, it was perfect:
All we did was giggle and have sex.

Think about that for a minute. So beautiful in a way! And so very Polly! Based on five hours straight of her story telling, I'd describe her as a simple woman, a social butterfly, and absolutely adorable as such. To her, nothing matters more than having a good time.

But I have to tell you, in an altogether different tone of voice, this would have been a searing indictment.

"All we did was giggle and have sex."

Frankly, for some of you readers (myself included), this would be a marriage from Hell. So fun, at first, all that giggling and having sex. By Day 8, it's starting to turn boring. And such a relationship would turn positively soul-stifling for the rest of the horrid mistake.

What about giving back to the community and the world? Making beautiful music together in a way that doesn't involve physical touching? Any chance we might share some learning? Or personal growth? How about a spiritual path or some values? What about traveling or creativity or learning a sport that could be played with clothes on?


Have you guessed the secret yet, a real life, Earth School alternative to having mating decisions made for you, courtesy of an obvious soul mate?

Here's a hint. "Veronica," one of my apprentices, had an astrology progression with Pat Hayward. He has been doing annual charts for me and my family for the past 18 years; it's the one type of reading I'm sure to get every year. Helps me choose good publishing periods for my books, for instance.

Veronica, knowing that I am a fan of Pat as well as her, gave me the chance to listen to her life reading. On the topic of children, Pat asked, "How do you feel about becoming a mother?"
Veronic answered, "I could go either way. I'm really not sure yet."

"That's what I thought," Pat said. "And you're so fortunate. It means that you don't have anything to work out in the parenting department."

He went on to share his experience, doing thousands of life charts. When somebody feels a strong urge from childhood to become a parent, very often it happens that at least one child will have major problems. Not a coincidence, according to Pat! Instead, the person has something to work through as a parent. That explains the strong feeling of "I must do this."

By contrast, what about people who don't feel they MUST be either parents or childless? These are the folks who lack a compelling need to be fruitful and add to global overpopulation. If they do decide to have children, those children will be a pleasure -- relatively easy to raise, compatible with the parents, etc.

Wow! This was certainly my story, undecided about parenting until age 42. Getting pregnant instantly, having the dream kid, easy to raise from infancy on. (Knock wood.)

What could freedom of choice have to do with finding a soul-growth relationship?


Some people really do meet up with soul mates and live happily ever after. They need that. If you know such a person, again, consider the source. Hasn't that person had a difficult life in other respects? That love relationship could be the person's one true and easy thing.

Certainly, if you look in the context of multiple incarnations, your love birds have earned every minute of bliss this time around.

Most relationships that seem to be "soul mate" shoe-ins wind up ending badly. Like Claudia's interlude with Jim, there could be emotional abuse, physical abuse, etc. These relationships get their oomph because they were written into Life Contracts.

Alternatively, you could consider the driving cause to be karma or frozen blocks held in cellular memory (the very thing I help clients to release in Energy Release Regression Therapy). Explanations like this are hardly mutually exclusive.

Personally, I believe in all three.

For most people and love relationships, here's the good news. Hundreds of people would make an appropriate life partner for you. Meeting any one of them, there's no loud fanfare. But as you get to know this one or that one, you find compatibility. You find mutual interests. You build a relationship.

Maybe you'll giggle and have sex. Maybe you'll do more than that.
Relationships like these aren't compulsions. At every stage of the relationship, you have free will.

You also get to grow as a person. A blinding attraction isn't all that holds your love together. There can be commitment, values, choice, developing social skills, refining those skills, using your full self to make the marriage work. Sometimes the love flows easily and other times you both use free will to move out obstructions.

Releasing cords of attachment to each other always helps, in my opinion. But so do plenty of other strategies. You find what works for you. Provided you don't give up, you'll always find that.

The culmination with a soul-growth mate could even be divorce. But there's no shame in that. You'll have grown all the way.
Whether lifelong relationships or shorter, soul-growth mates always win. If you have been given this opportunity, rather than the much mythologized soul mate type of relationship, consider yourself fortunate.

You're cordially invited to add your comments at my blog, "Deeper Perception Made Practical.

Author's Bio: 

Rose Rosetree is the founder of Energy Spirituality, offering aura readings that include Cutting Cords of Attachment , Aura Transformation, and Regression Therapy .

If you're interested in reading faces, check out her Face Readings, another form of spiritual reading.

She's an Expert on Aura here at

Prefer to study directly? Rose teaches workshops internationally on doing intuitive reading. (Most client sessions are via telephone, with details at her website.

Rosetree is also known for her how-to books:

* “Read People Deeper: Body Language + Face Reading + Auras” , the first book to combine all three different forms of deeper perception,

* “AURA Reading Through All Your Senses” , to help you get skills at reading energy fields.

*"Cut CORDS of Attachment: Heal Yourself and Others with Energy Spirituality" , a healing how-to,

*"Empowered by EMPATHY”with leading-edge techniques that Rose teaches internationally,

*“The Power of FACE Reading”, and

*“ Let Today Be a HOLIDAY.”

One title has become a bestseller in Germany; in America, two have been selections of One Spirit Book Club. If you want to learn to do spiritual reading and also empower yourself in everyday life, you're going to enjoy Rose's work.

Many foreign editions of her books have been published, with information available here

With over 140,000 copies sold, Rosetree's books help readers to discover emotional and spiritual healing, better relationships, self-awareness and inspiration. Order Rose's books, published through Women's Intuition Worldwide, or call toll-free 800-345-6665.

At Rose Rosetree's website, you’ll also find free articles, FAQs, and practical ways to use Deeper Perception to make life better. Sign up for "Read Life Deeper," her free monthly zine with face and aura readings of people in the news, at Rosetree's blog is called "Deeper Perception Made Practical." You are invited to join this lively, interactive community.

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