Reconciliation of You

Sigmund Freud was certainly right about one thing. Human beings do have a ‘personality trinity’ that actually reflects many such equivalent three-part government and social systems. However, I think the three concepts originally used may not convey the relevant story today. Three was right, but we can’t relate to Id, Ego and Super-Ego today. What we can relate to is the conflicts that occur between our heads, hearts and souls and what they each tell us is the most beneficial choice at hand in our life journeys. Often the answer is going in three different directions from three different languages.

The process of growing up in life is an ongoing journey of becoming fully self-actualized in applying our talents to accomplish our unlimited potential for being successful in carrying out our assigned purpose in life. Above all else this involves taping into the awesome power of our own trinities through reconciling what drives our heads, hearts and souls and what they each alone and collectively want from us..

What drives our heads is thinking how to be successful in understanding, predicting, controlling and changing realities in life to get the outcomes we think we want to get what we think we want. What drives our hearts is feeling compassion for the bleeding, bruises and broken bones of the tragedies and sorrows others in their stories and life journeys. What drives our souls is the search for the whole truth through experiences of expanding our creativity and ability to love unconditionally and stop the toxic fear of angst and insecurity. Now you can easily see how these three parts of us can quickly come up with entirely different agendas that involve cross-purposes and exclusive hoped-for outcomes.

The conflicts that often pop up between the drives and conclusions of our heads, hearts and souls is much like our criminal justice non-system of factionary components with the police, courts and corrections all working against each other and not trying to reconciling the inherent, divergent conflict between them. And of course the same is true of our three branches of government—the Executive, Legislative and Judicial branches working for the good of the whole country, majority of voters and individual rights.

Part of the reconciliation process of getting our heads, hearts and souls working together as a true system, is allowing each of them to have their say and then understanding how in include what each is saying into better, wiser choices. One really can’t dominate the other for any length of time and realizing the wisdom of listening to or doing something without cautious moderation will always take one of these sources of knowing past its intended purpose and leave you less empty-handed than when you started. In the course of living, you just have to explore each one of these ways of knowing, to get to know it so to speak.

An especially troublesome conflict occurs when your head tells you one thing and your heart another. This happens a lot in relationships. Which one do you follow? Neither course seems to be foolproof 100% of the time, which leaves you confused.

Part of this confusion is that your ego or sense of separate self has crept into the operations of you head, heart and soul. The results of this intrusion is a dualistic yes-no war between your psychological conscience and your moral conscience. Since your thinking usually gets more airtime than your feelings or your experiences, your self is center stage often enough to assume credit for all your choices and accomplishments. But ha, you really can’t fool your soul, which always knows the truth. And that is because you were born with the truth buried deep in your unconscious, which is a big part of your soul, right along side of you moral conscience.

With enough compassion from the heart and creativity of the soul surfacing, comes the flash realization you will hit the jackpot when the truth is recognized through serendipity as it hovers between your head, heart and soul. This is not something you can anticipate or otherwise orchestrate; it has to happen all on its own.

You can’t really speed this process up, but you can do a few things which can decrease the discomfort of the conflicts when they do occur between your head, heart and soul, and especially between your psychological and moral conscience.

1. Don’t take yourself so seriously—especially with what you think you know about conflicts and their resolution. Conflicts are for growth, and the land ahead is always unknown. Solve one problem or conflict and another one will come along to take you even further in the journey if you let it.

2. Simplify your emotions into two categories—love (positive) and fear (negative). Positive feelings let you know you are moving in the right direction in this journey, while negative feelings are just a gentle warning that you may be moving in the wrong direction and should probably rethink your approach to what you are trying to do.

3. Soulful living is the naturally evolving end goal of our little trip and so it a good idea to learn how to let go of something like your ego and thinking, as well as your selective compassion, when these things have delivered you to your next stage of transformation.

4. When you have mastered the art of soulful thriving, your head, heart and soul are finally singing off the same sheet of music. Then you have the peace and understanding that you always knew was there for you. The it becomes time to share this genuine peace with others.