Yesterday I had the special opportunity to speak at a mom's club meeting in my area. I found myself in the company of intelligent, loving, curious and nurturing women. The theme of my message was "living a life aligned with your values." This seems like such an easy concept, but when we look, we see that the "values driven choices" often get edged out by "shoulds, responsibilities and social pressures" to name only a few.

We each get 1,440 minutes each day to "invest" in what matters most to us. (Notice I said invest and not "use". If having a killer physique and vibrant, healthy body are high on your values list, by all means spend two hours in the gym. If tending a fruitful garden ranks high....spend time weeding. If your professional work ranks higher than your health, know that value judgment will manifest congruent results.

We all get to pick. Contrary to what we may want to believe---No one can strong arm us into decisions that are not aligned with our values unless we allow it. Taking responsibility for our 1,440 is one way to show you have reached spiritual adulthood.

Another question came up after my talk. People wonder how to "get" others to think more positive, be less reactionary or less defensive. My answer may be unpopular but it is simple. You don't. You don't "get" anyone to do anything. It seems to me there are three choices in dealing with negative and/or defensive people in your life.

1. Accept them and love them as they are and be vigilant about not letting their way of being rub off on you.

2. Set the intention that you will create such a positive environment, making yourself immune to negativity---and make to the "You become like what you are around" philosophy work its magic.

3. Disconnect with the person because he/she does not serve the vision you have for our life. Even if that means ending a friendship, finding new work or ending a relationship.

You are not responsible for anyone's actions, responses or way of being. We may want support others so they may find their "happy place," but make no mistake, everyone has to do their own work.

Author's Bio: 

Rena M. Reese is the Founder of Soul Salon International a company dedicated the physical and spiritual revivals of individuals and corporations. Rena is a author, speaker, coach and radio host who shares her message internationally. Visit her at