Are you a controlling wife? Do you take your husband for granted? Most women don’t realize it but they abuse their husbands daily just by their actions. Many women of today feel that marriage revolves solely around them and their husband’s are supposed to give them everything their heart desires.

If we aren’t getting what we want from our man could it be because we are not treating our man like a man? Stop pushing him around and he’ll come around.

1. Don’t undermine your husband’s decision making

This is a biggy in marriage. Isn’t it true that we women want things our way! We have been taught from grade school to go after our dreams and aspirations in life no matter what the consequences, even if that means rejecting our husband’s needs and wishes. We do what WE want and what WE need. Why would a woman of today be so determined to chip away at her husband’s manly authority and advice?

Face it ladies, we haven’t exactly helped to make our man feel like a man. If we don’t accept the man we married, why would we expect to get what we want from him? If we are rejecting, blaming, controlling, demeaning, undermining, and complaining about our husbands we certainly aren’t respecting the man we married.

If we weaken our husband’s manly resolve what’s left but our feminist attitude and bossy selfish egos? Are we taking the man we married for granted? I think we are and that’s what’s killing marriage! How do I know all this? I used to undermine my husband all the time. I wouldn’t let him be the man of the house. I was bossy and rebellious. I want you to know what I have come to know. It’s great!

2. Don’t reject your husband

How many times last month did you tell your husband that you were too tired or had a headache or simply shrugged him off because you were mad at him? Probably more times then you really think. Shouldn’t we want to satisfy our husband’s needs every single day, regardless, whether we feel like it or not? We women need to please and satisfy the men we’re married to and we’ll get our hearts desire. We really will!

3. Give your husband space (time with buddies)

Do you complain because your husband likes to have free time away with the guys? Maybe you feel he should be home doing chores or watching the children on his day off. But face it ladies, our man deserves time away to be with his friends to play golf, fish or hunt, or whatever it is he does just as much as we deserve to be with our friends. Did you know that a husband that is allowed the freedom to be with his buddies is a happier and more content filled man? Isn’t that what we want anyway?

4. Cook your husband hot and nutritious meals every day

It is so true that one way to our man’s heart is through his stomach. Ask any man and he’ll tell you. I know that some of you ladies who work out of the home just don’t have the time to cook nice meals everyday. Buy a crock-pot and a crock-pot cookbook and learn to make delicious homemade meals with it. Crock-pot cooking is so simple. You throw all the ingredients in the pot and it cooks safely all day, and the food will be ready when you both come home from work.

5. Respect your husband

What’s so hard about respecting the man we married? If we control the marriage and feel that our husband can’t do anything as good as we can, we certainly won’t be able to respect him, right? Is treating your husband like one of the children respecting him? Is complaining about their faults respecting him? Is telling him what he’s going to do respecting him? Is rejecting him sexually respecting him? Is belittling him respecting him? Well then, stop doing all these things and you are on your way to respecting the man you married.

6. Let your husband protect you

God made man to be the protector of women. Men love to do it, they want to do it, and they feel like a man when we let them do it. But most married women don’t feel they need protected because they can take care of themselves. They carry mace, a gun and take karate classes and act like a man and still, they are getting beaten, raped, manhandled, and murdered. If a woman is married why on earth would she want to take away her husbands god-given natural abilities as a protector?

A married woman needs to allow her husband do his job in the manner in which he does it best, by protecting and loving his wife with the natural abilities God gave him. How can a man do that when the woman won’t let him? This is how a man loves his woman!

Seriously now, it’s really that simple. What would happen if we didn’t allow our husbands to protect us? We would be rejecting their love for us. Don’t you want to be loved by your man? Did you know that when we don’t let our husband’s love us the way God meant for a man to love his wife, we are rebelling against God?

7. Submit to your husband (love God)

Ladies, first you must learn to submit to God. This was a major issue in my marriage for many years because I didn’t accept God. I was looking out into the world for the answers to my marriage problems when the answers were within my spiritual self the whole time. I finally grew to accept and love God. That is the root of submitting right there.

By growing out from the selfish person I was, I learned to understand what submitting to my husband was all about. Once a woman learns to submit to her husband she will see that by submitting she is actually in more control of the marriage and a better marriage wife because of it. In other words, a woman will not lose anything of her self by submitting but will gain more of herself that was lost.

“Now I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” 1 Corinthian’s 11:3

Author's Bio: 

Angie Lewis writes on subjects such as love, sex, and intimacy between couples. Her books center on the biblical foundations that God outlines for couples to follow for an exceptional marriage. Angie writes numerous articles and e-books covering such issues as adultery, addictions, temptation, and forgiveness in marriage. See website for more information about Angie's books or online marriage ministry.