I’m Sitting Here With a Mudpack on My Face

Feeling short of breath, a little fuzzy, can’t remember where you put your car keys, what time to pick up your kids, or where you agreed to meet your boss for lunch? Are you feeling less like the ‘glue’ and just a bit blue? Perhaps it’s time to take a look at all you do and make a resolution to simply care more for you.

Lessons from Momma
My mother started working at age twelve and didn’t stop working until three months before her 81st birthday. Throughout her life, Momma was a beekeeper, tomato farmer, personal assistant, secretary, nurse’s aid, sales person and dressing room attendant. Besides her ‘day job,’ she was a wife, mother, daughter, chief cook and bottle washer.

When Momma had a day off, she continued to work…doing for others. For instance she loved to bake cookies for the Holidays and would then complain that she ate too many herself. I’d say “Momma you already have six dozen in the freezer and there are no Holidays in sight, why don’t you give yourself a break?” She’d reply, “Honey, if I stop working, I don’t know what would happen. It’s all I know.” Momma died 6 months after she quit her ‘day job’ and one month after a heart attack prevented her from “doing” for others.

I loved my Momma and for a while, tried to be just like her. I frantically ran around keeping busy and caring for everyone else. I felt exhausted and depleted. I couldn’t live like this. I realized the best way I could honor my Mother was to honor myself. Here is what I learned to regain my energy and ‘airspace’:

Lesson 1: Put On My Oxygen Mask
The next time you fly the friendly skies listen carefully to the flight attendants safety instructions: In the unlikely even of an emergency, the air mask above you will drop – the elastic band will fit comfortably around your head – and breathe. Do not … I repeat. Do not; assist anyone else around you until your oxygen mask is securely in place. To take better care of others, I need to take care of me first.

Lesson 2: Ask For a Little Pink Spoon
Taking care of you is a personal thing. Would you visit the ice cream parlor and have the server present you with their favorite flavor? There was a time I would’ve said ”I don’t know what I like, what do you like? “ I certainly wouldn’t have thought to ask for a little pink spoon to sample my preference. I need to know what brings me joy.

Lesson 3: Savor Tiny Thrills
You do not have to book yourself in a spa for a week or max out your credit card limit on extravagant luxuries. Sprinkle tiny indulgences throughout your day…little gifts that keep on giving. Everything counts, even small amounts!

My Ten Simple Thrills
1. Journaling inner musings or my day’s highlights
2. Reading a fun book or light magazine
3. Taking a bubble bath (sometimes more than one a day)
4. Splurging on a new lipstick or nail color, applying it and relishing in the newness
5. Adding a cinnamon stick to my morning coffee and taking a big whiff or pouring myself an evening glass of champagne (seltzer or any bubbly beverage works) putting the glass near my face to spritz with bubbles
6. Delighting in pure energy (watching children frolic or my mini-dachshunds play)
7. Hopping on my bike and riding like the wind or talking a brisk stroll…fresh air therapy
8. Watching comedies and applying “funny” to my life – a belly laugh is aerobics for my soul
9. Sitting in my lanai and watching the palm trees - breathing in as they sway right, and breathing out as they sway left.
10. Wearing a mudpack on my face while I’m reading, writing or talking on the phone

Write down your top ten ‘flavors,’ paste the list in full view, sprinkle throughout your day and feel life’s “bubbles on your skin.” Oops! Speaking of skin, time to wash the mudpack off my face. Looking in the mirror, I smile at her face. I am still my Momma…just freer.