How a Paintbrush Changed My Life

What would you do if you were given a gift or a tool that could change the way you are living your life in an instant?

In June 2008, I knew that it was time to really move on. I had had a comfortable rest period in which I could just simply relax and enjoy life as reward for a 2 year intensive crash course on spiritual development, by the end of which I declared that I did not wish to hear or make one more affirmation, receive any spiritual guidance or be in sight of the smallest inkling of an aura.

My guides, angels and Higher Self, all kindly obliged and I received a grace period of 9 months. In March 2008, I had a very, very vivid vision of me packing my bags and moving, it was so clear I could see that I would be leaving a lot of things behind and that it would not matter. I moved with my youngest son the following month with no warning after a break in and found myself staying with my sister and her children. I left a lot of things behind, placed a few things into storage, my son and lived out of our suitcases for the next two months.

By June, I knew it was time to be on the move again. My grace period was finished and it was time for me to get back into action. I woke up one morning, knowing that we had to be out of my sister’s place before the end of the next month. Two weeks later, we moved into our new home.

At the same time, I received clear guidance that I should go into coaching, which would lead me to fulfill my life’s purpose. Although, I did not know much about coaching at the time, for me it actually fit like a glove. It felt so right and since most of my life, I had always played the role of helping or supporting others in some way or another, this really rang true with me. I had been consulting for the preceding 15 years and would sometimes get frustrated at the lack of ownership or responsibility of my clients, I realized with coaching, my clients could no longer hide behind me or others if they did not achieve their goals. The ownership is entirely on them to get the job done!

At this stage, I believed that my spiritual apprenticeship was well and truly over, since now I knew enough to use what I had learned to support and guide me in my everyday life. Little did I know that on the contrary, I was about to be catapulted into spirituality of a much higher level!

The Gift – A Paint brush called Consciousness Coaching®

I realize that after my “graduation”, I was given a gap year and now I was to begin my spiritual MBA! My curriculum entailed classroom studies, assignments and practical studies. One of the first assignments was to get out there and get myself noticed. This was to be one of biggest challenges ever, because I have always had a total aversion to sales and sales people in general. I most certainly did not know how to sell myself, since I had never seen myself as a product and yet this is the first thing I chose for myself as an assignment.

The vision of founder Marc Steinberg "Causing a revolution in consciousness for wisdom and love to become a world wide reality through Consciousness Coaching ®” did not really resonate with me, in fact, I even resisted the method during my initial Master I training, however I “knew” that this was absolutely the right training academy for me and that I needed to get my accreditation through them.

During those initial four days, a massive transformation took place – everything I thought I knew, no longer existed… mmmhhh… I mean that it no longer existed in my consciousness as I knew it, simply because with the new awareness acquired during the Master I training, I could easily see how I had created illusions around who I thought I was or needed to be in order to fit into society.

I was given a paintbrush and a white canvas and told to create the new me. I thought, what good is this to me, I can’t paint, Man! I can’t even draw a little stick man! I knew something fundamental had occurred and that I had received something precious but I chose to leave the paintbrush aside and create my new life with what I already had.

Man! I was in trouble! All my life was a lie! This thought or realization hit me even harder later as more “layers of snow” were revealed to me as I progressed in integrating the CCI method of coaching into every aspect of my life. The constant growth and change was phenomenal as I understood that the only thing that controls my destiny is me! What a scary thought, everything, even the bad things were caused by me? Circumstances, synchronicity, fate or luck were all created by me… Boy! What a responsibility.

As I discovered or uncovered the real me under all the layers of snow, I became terrified of the possibilities and the responsibility to self and to others in terms of what I could cause or create in other peoples lives and at one stage I opened one of Pandora’s boxes and was petrified that I could not get everything back in there again. With all my might, I resisted what I had uncovered and I remember sharing with my soul sister, that it felt like I was stuck in the birth canal, being squeezed and suffocating as I fought to remain where I felt safe and secure. I knew that where I was coming from might not have been easy all the time, in fact it was often very painful and difficult but at least I knew what I knew and so it was comfortable. I was fighting to stay where I was because I did not want to step into the unknown of the possibilities I had created, and so I chose to stay in the birth canal and suffered excruciating pain for a few days. I emerged, very fragile and vulnerable and blaming the world and everyone in it for my troubles.

With each Masters that I completed, came greater awakening and thus greater awareness and at the beginning of this year, I came to realize that it truly was several rebirthing processes. Everything I had learned until I came across Consciousness Coaching was to prepare me for the rebirth of myself as Master of my Destiny; the conductor of my life or the paintbrush that creates a new reality upon a white canvas each and every day, and one day I saw very clearly that I had the choice as to how I would be reborn… it was very simple… I could choose to be born in doubt and pain, resisting, struggling, kicking and screaming all the way or I could choose to be reborn with love, compassion, joy, and laughter and supported by my Higher Self and empathic people who loved me for who I am.

So this time when the squeeze came, I surrendered totally to the moment and felt the discomfort of the pressure because I was very present to what was occurring, however, there was very little pain as I allowed myself to emerge into the most beautiful and loving light, the one that brings with it all of that forgiveness and compassion and allows all manner of abundance and joy to flow into our lives. It brought with it also a sense of peace and serenity and simply acceptance of what is.

Another 9 months have passed since I began my journey with the CCI coaching Academy; I have just completed my Master IV and will be qualifying as an accredited coach this month. The journey along the way has been one of the most extraordinary episodes of my life and brings with it, a new life and the knowing that “Anything Is Possible”, with the full awareness, that every thought transforms into action, whether I act on it or someone else does.

The fact that the method is easily integrated into ones own life, is one of the greatest values that I have received from using some of the other tools received over the past 9 months, since it has enabled me to open a very strong and powerful dialogue with my 14 year old son. Imagine that, a tool that gets teens to talk to parents?

I now consciously choose to act on my own creations from now on and be the paintbrush that creates the Masterpieces of my life… what would you choose to do if you were given such a gift?

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