Drama occurs all around us. We don't think of ourselves asa drama queen or king. "isn't that a movie?" isn't that aneighbor, co-worker, friend, or in-law? For artists, dramacontributes to their creative production. There is a darkerside. One we don't want to admit to. At least not easily.
We add drama in order to make life or situations moreinteresting. Artists like to do this when their creativityis blocked. Drama adds fizz to imagination. We also createdrama when we're bored or need to shelter our feelings.
Drama, thought of as a serious narrative for fiction, canalso be serious emotional muck that zaps both creativity andsuccess. Like quicksand, we don't know you're in it untilyou can't move your legs.
A friend, let’s name her Jane, phones and pulls you in withher BMW (bitch, moan and whine). She curls your ear aboutlife not going according to her plan. You have just becomestuck in her drama. You pat your foot and think about whatelse you could be doing. The critic justifies staying with:"She’s your friend. She listens to your BMW." Afterwards,your energy sags.
Drama is easier to see in other people, it is harder to seethe muck we create for ourselves. Here is a process thatwill assist your awareness and propel you forward:
Step 1: Recognize when the drama is appearing or when itdid appear. Do you drag yourself out of bed? That’s drama.Do you moan and groan about something? That’s drama. Ourinner critic has a natural ability to ignite drama when youdon't want to do something. Did you give an excuse forsomething? That’s drama. We're you late because youweren't sure you wanted to go? Drama! Excessive emotion isdrama.
Step 2: Acknowledge the event as unnecessary. When youacknowledge it as unnecessary and you are in a dramaticmoment, the shift begins.
Step 3: Identify what part, or whole, is "just" your part?Weed out the other players. See only your part. Decide:Are you going to continue or change it?Step 4: Begin the transformation. Write or carefully thinkthrough what occurred. If you see the drama unfoldingbefore you, and it includes other players, stop, don'tcontinue just to save face. Once you decide to transformit, declare it out loud three times.
Let me share with you one of my changing events...
My fought my own thoughts as I moved down the isles. "Yes, Ineed these? No, I don't really need this?" Justifyingwith the great price. I stared at items without seeing asmy thoughts fought. "Should I or shouldn't I." At thecheckout counter, I couldn't let go of the items so thecashier could price and bag them. Slowly I let go.
When it came time to pay, I stopped, looked at her, andexplained that I changed my mind. I apologized, slightlyembarrassed. Not so surprised but delighted from myexplanation, she said thank you, she learned something to.I said, "Me too."
I sat on the mall bench in disbelief for quite some time.It was one of those memorable moments. One I still remembervery clearly today. It took time to process what occurredbut I did see that my spending process changedsignificantly. It was one of my shifts in seeing my drama.
Step 5: Make a conscious choice to let it go.
Step 6: Take action. Talk with someone about it -- afriend, clergy, or coach. Just do it. If you prefer towrite your way through the process, do it. Process itlovingly. For when you see the drama as if it’s atelevision soap opera "an out of body view" this particulardrama behavior ends.
Step 7: Repeat this phrase three times: "And this haspassed. I now move forward in joy and success."
Enjoy the less dramatic you and watch your new successunfold.
Your Assignment, If You Choose To Take This On
Make a list, 1-10. Close your eyes and revisit the last 24hours. See where the drama occurred? What was yourcontribution? Was the drama getting the kids to go to bed?Did you procrastinate on something and then create drama toget you started? Write down even the smallest memory. Eventhe appearances you're not sure of. Choose one. Start withStep 1.
(c) Copyright 2005, Catherine Franz. All rights reserved.
Catherine Franz, is a syndicated marketing columnist, radio host, International speaker, and master business coach. http://www.abundancecenter.com Also availablein audio.
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