Make the Best of Your Breakup or Divorce

After a breakup or divorce everyone goes through a rollercoaster of emotions. There is anger, resentment, regret, sadness and even joy. Some days you may feel that the divorce or breakup was the best thing that could happen. Other days you may feel as if you want to turn back time and be back in the relationship. The turmoil that you feel is a solid ground to create a new life for yourself. How can you do that?

Pain and suffering are always signals that call us into changes. Many times we would not have made the decisions that would lead us to a better life, so the crisis and pain comes and forces us into a new direction. After the end of a relationship we have work to do. Rebuilding our identity and self-esteem are priorities, but many of us will choose to avoid looking inside.

To make the best of your breakup or divorce you must be willing to look inside, to look into your strength and courage and take action to re-discover yourself. A whole new life awaits you, and this end of an era for you may only be the beginning of a new era. The new times in your life will be a reflection of the lessons that you learn and the growth that you achieved after the breakup or divorce. Don’t run away from the true healing that comes from facing what happened, accepting your responsibility and the results of your choices, seeing the lessons during and after the relationship, and taking yourself to a new level. Following those four steps is the best gift you can give to yourself.

You are going through a hard time, make the best out of it by really healing and growing from this experience, your life will be so much better and you may never have to go through the same lessons again.

After a breakup, everybody has two choices. One, leave the healing to time. Two, take charge of the recovery process. The first method will take a long time, pain and suffering before healing. It is slow and torturous. The second method, taking control, will allow anyone to accelerate the healing process, learn fast and move on, leaving space to find healthier and more fulfilling love than ever before. You may need some guidance on the steps for a fast and productive emotional healing. We have never been taught how to heal emotionally, so when we go through an emotional situation we are on our own. Find the way to make the best out of this breakup, break the rules of a slow painful healing and join the crowd that choose to take control heal fast and permanently.

© 2004 Jeanette Castelli. Adapted from “Extreme Breakup Recovery” by Jeanette Castelli, M.S. A do it yourself Workshop-In-A-Book®. Features a step-by-step guidance through the Extreme F.A.S.T. method: proven for quick, permanent and productive recovery from any breakup or divorce. Includes exercises, worksheets and affirmations. Book available at bookstores and online retailers worldwide. ISBN: 0-9742061-3-X. For more information, visit website: Email: E-Book available at website.

Author's Bio: 

The Author, Jeanette Castelli, M.S. is an expert in self-empowerment, relationships and recovery. She is a self-improvement author, speaker and coach. Her education includes a Bachelor Of Science of Psychology, a Master Of Science of Psychology and a Master Of Business Administration (MBA). Her belief is in self-empowerment to create true changes in life by "doing not just reading." Her books feature an interactive, user-friendly step-by step guidance with practical, real life applications of the theory. She has written "Extreme Breakup Recovery" and "The Joy Of Dating Again" To contact the author email to or visit or