So few people take the time to get to know themselves. To become their own best friend.
I would bet that a good 80% of the population out there wouldn't be able to spend more than
10 minutes in a room completely alone with absolutely no entertainment at all. No radio, no books,
no television. Nothing. Without the ability to love yourself. Without taking the time to know who
you are and what it is you are bringing to a relationship, you stand a very little chance of finding
the person who will help bring happiness and joy to you. You stand a very small chance of finding
the love of a lifetime.

The most important thing you can do to attract the love of a lifetime is spend time
with yourself. Take the time to get to know yourself. Become your own best friend.
Learn what makes you tick. Your likes, dislikes, reactions, habits, desires, and sorrows.
Take the time to spend with yourself learning who you are. What you are. How you became
that way. Here are a few things you can do to really begin to develop a relationship with yourself
and learn to develop a deep love for the person you are. Not an ego based cocky love as though
you are everything. But instead, a healthy deep rooted love for the person you are. For the unique,
beautiful, powerful, incredible being that you are.

1. Create a list of all of your positive traits. Take the time to create a list, on paper, of all of your
positive traits. List everything you like and love about yourself. What do other people say are
your strong, positive traits? Take the time to add to the list every single day. Add at least one
new thing a day. Add new things as you realize them. It can be as simple as the way you walk
or your smile. The more you do this, the more you will be able to see about yourself. You may
even amaze yourself at how great of a person you already are.

2. Take the time to also evaluate your weeknesses and what you would consider negative traits.
It is important to do this from a stand point of evaluation. We can sometimes be our own worst
enemy and critic. This is not about judging who you are. This process is about taking a honest
look at yourself and what needs work yet. Without seeing this about yourself, you can't work on
those things that need improvement. That is the great thing about this. Once you know it is a
weekness, you now have the option of doing something about it or not. You can't fix something
until you know it needs fixed. So few people want to evaluate themselves from this perspective
because as humans, we don't want to admit what needs work. However, if you are truly on a path
of power and improvement, you must. As I say, you can't get there from not here, and not here
is where you are if you don't know where here is. Take the time to do this, but be easy on yourself.

3. Go out and find things that scare you. After you find things that are outside your comfort zone
or things that scare you, do them. Push your boundries. The more you step outside what is comfortable,
and the more you do things that are not normal for you, the more you will begin to develop a deep healthy
love for yourself. You will begin to be amazed at what you are capable of. Your confidence level and
self-esteem will shoot through the roof and you will want to do bigger and better things.

4. Know that you are already perfect just as you are. Realize that you are deserving of the love
of a lifetime. Realize that you are an incredible and amazing person just as you are. Develop your
own standard for yourself and ignore what others believe to be true. If they knew, would they
be so miserable? Learn not to blame yourself for things or criticize yourself so easily. God created
us all perfectly. When we say that we need to work on things, what that means is that there are
things about us that stop us from creating the results we want in our lives. However, we are already
perfect for being able to create our lives exactly as they are right now. We are perfect, right now, for
something, and someone, right now, as we are. The real question is whether or not that right now
is the right now you want for the rest of your life, or if you want a better right now.

5. Learn to see the best in everyone and everything. Learn to recognize the natural beauty in everything
and everyone. Make your happiness the number one goal in your life. By learning to see the beauty,
and the joy, and the incredible wonderfulness in everything and every moment you will begin to grow
happier by every single moment of your life.

6. Stop taking responsibility for making other people happy. Your own happiness must be your number
one priority. Our society has taught us to think about others, and we are often criticized for not thinking
about others or looked down upon for being selfish. Though this doesn't have to be a selfish thing, you must
learn to care for yourself and take care of yourself first, then worry about taking care of others. How can you ever
expect to give more to others if you don't first give to yourself. If you only have ten bucks, and you need that to eat,
you can't give it away no matter how much you may want to. It would only be a bad thing for you. you must
learn to take care of you. After you get good at that, goodness and happiness will over flow from you. Then,
and only then, will you be able to help others realize happiness on their own.

7. Know right here and right now, that you cannot change or control anyone else or anyone elses life.
You have control over your own life, and that is all. Happiness is a choice. We all choose how to respond
to every single thing in our lives that happens to us. We choose to be happy, or sad, or joyful, or disappointed.
We must learn to make a concious decision in every single moment of our lives to be happy. This one realization
alone could change everything in your life. Take care of your own happiness, and choose to be happy. Remember,
every minute spent angry, or sad, or upset, or anything like that is a minute we had a chance to be happy, and a minute
that we will never get back and have the opportunity have happiness in.

Learning to love and appreciate yourself is the biggest and most important thing you can do for yourself
and to attract the love of your dreams. If you wish to find the love of a lifetime, start by looking within yourself
first. That is where it all begins, and without starting there, you are doomed. There is no greater love, and more
valuable love than the love you have for yourself. After all, you do spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days
a year with yourself for your entire life. Who better to love you and for you to learn to love than yourself.

Author's Bio: 

Dwayne Gilbert is the founder of and has been helping people in the area of self-protection
and personal development for 10 years. He has authored some of his own books and currently teaches people self-defense and
personal development strategies and tactics. To get more information on the law of attraction and how to apply it, visit .