Emma James, NLP Trainer and NLP Sport Trainer discusses our perception of reality and memories and if any of our memories and reality is in fact real.

So, what is out reality? What in fact are our memories?

Our reality is completely based on our experience, our events through our life, the environment we grew up in, our social circle and our external stimulus plus the way in which we think and our own values and beliefs.

All of these things come together to give us what we believe is our reality.

In fact, our own reality is what we see through our own eyes and how we process information and no one person will have the same “reality” as anyone else. It is a little bit like a finger print.

For example – if there is a car accident and 10 people see the accident, in the police statements there will be 10 different accounts of the accident. One might be able to tell you the car, the angle of impact, the approximate speed and will not be able to give a description of the person. Someone else might be able to give you a detailed description of the people in the cars right down to the Gucci handbag, but not be able to describe the cars.

We only retain the information which we deem “important” or “pertinent” to us depending on the filters already explained in the earlier pages.

The amount of information coming at us is approximately 2,000,000 bits of information per second, the amount we retain is approximately 134 bits per second – so depending on how our “filters” are working, depends on what information we keep.

So – in essence – no one’s reality is in fact real. It is only our perception and what we believe to be true.

Therefore – the question is…………………are our memories in fact reality?

Of course the bare facts of the actual events will be real but how others were acting and how and why we reacted the way we did are subjective.

For instance, if you were 2 years old and you wandered into a room where the light was turned off and your Mum walked past closing the door, then that may have been a major trauma at that second for you. It may have felt like you were there locked in that room for 3 days when in fact you were there for 10 seconds before your Mum heard you and rushed back to open the door.
So, you are left with a memory or as we call it “internal representation”, which is that you were locked in a room for 3 days at age 2.

The facts were that you were in a room with the lights off at 2 years old and the door was shut and then opened again at a later interval. The rest of the information you retained was your own perception of what happened.

So, are you ready to let go of the past? Do you need to hang on to emotions connected with negative memories when part of those memories will be based on subjective interpretation?
Are you willing to change your reality at any given moment depending on what information you need to retain?

Another question is - if you are prepared to do this – are you also willing to let go of negative emotions and forgive yourself and others in order to be able to move forward?

Author's Bio: 

The director of Emma James Training Ltd is Emma James (amazingly!) who is a trainer of NLP, Hypnosis and Master TLT but also a Master Practitioner in all three therapies. Originally from Northern Ireland she has the drive and passion to constantly prove that NLP works, not only in her sport and coaching of others, but in therapy at her clinic and also in business application, taking people to levels they didnt think were possible.