Perhaps many friends have experienced a deep feeling of regret for making wrong decisions when in angry situation. we come to realize it is so different to make decisions in peaceful state and in argry state. A win-win decision is welcome and great if we can try to take actions or make decisions in a relative peaceful state. Writing is just such a method for you to come to a peaceful state so as to get a better decision.

Tag: angry management, win-win decision, make decision, peaceful state

Actuation is monster.

The decision we made, are making and will make is a function of many elements, one of which is your state or emotion. In peaceful state, we can make a more sound decision which will lead to a better result, while in angry state, we always change to a stranger even to ourselves and make a terrible decision. Sometimes the terrible decision will leave a great regret for your whole life. The situation will get worse for immature persons, they will lose control of themselves, let the bad words even bad actions burst out at ease. Eventually, a regretting result comes into being.

Everything, whatever good or bad, is a best arrangement for you.

The sentence above is really a best suggestion. In fact, we are always taught to look at the good of one thing because everything has two sides, but it is easier said than done. Suppose that if we can always deal with things according to the sentence, then we can make better decisions, eventually we will live happier, show more love in our heart to lover with peaceful and fulfilling feelings full of our heart.

Many times I have to admit that when I finish a decision, I begin to regret, especially in bad emotion state. The words and actions in actuation have put me into a great sense of regret and quilt. Sometimes we can make up for the bad results, while sometimes we can only take response for the eternal regret ourselves.

I decided to change and I am now on the road. Completely changing to perfection is a bit difficult, but we can make improvement little by little everyday. Through practice, I find it is a good tip to write down to come to a better decision.

How writing can help us to make a better decision?

Calm down to a good state

The speed of mind is far faster than that of writing. Mind is light-weight and can change from one point to another at once, while writing can’t. Without guideline, our mind will go anywhere, including some bad, worse, worst places. What you see, hear and touch will immediately lead to the link between the “facts” you feel and the corresponding response in your mind. The whole procedure is a matter of instant. Avoiding making decisions and taking actions in bad state is a wise choice. Perhaps it is the best decision to leave for a period of peace. Writing can only be helpful when you can drag yourself out of the angry environment or before take actions in it. With writing as a guideline to mind and good questions as beacons of decisions, you can come to a better state little by little, which is a base for cleverer decision.

Guide us to a more serious and better decision easily

We have to admit that what we are writing are what we are thinking of. We will think again when we write our thoughts down. If we can ask ourselves some good questions, we will certainly get a good answer and come to a better decision.

1. What are good questions?
Sometimes, we are angry with someone who has a close relationship with us, so it is foolish to destroy this valuable relationship. The best decision is a win-win decision. In my opinion, I suggest a series of questions may be as follows:
What is the excellent example for me to learn from to deal with such kind of anger?

The first thing we can think of is to find some excellent examples so that we can imitate them to make decisions. I always choose President Lincoln and Franklin as my examples. President Lincoln is respected as the most respectful president in the American history and Franklin is also respected as a great person. They both have the valuable virtue of never criticizing others. I come to realize that this virtue is the most important principle I should know and apply from my experience.

When examples chosen, we will ask such a question:
2. What decision will my examples make when they face such a situation?

In this way, I guide myself to think in a good way and get a constructive answer, and then I write it down at once. It may seem a bit ludicrous, but you will feel that peace are coming to you if you complete this two steps.

3.What decision shall I do to make a win-win decision?
Everything will be past no matter it is happiness or pain. To get a win-win decision, we have to admit our fault first and find answer standing in the view of the other person. Use T-F table to guide you finding the detail information for a sound decision.
The procedure of answering questions is the procedure to make a good decision, just enjoy it and practice more.

4.How can I share this decision with the other person?
To make a successful share, we can adjust our emotion first. An effective affirmation I suggest is:

In an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way, for the most good of all concerned, I am creating a wonderful and successful communication with him/her.

Repeat this affirmation for about 10 times with gentle and slow tongue and you can take action. Of course, if you can write this affirmation slowly and beautifully for 10 times, you will get a better effect.

Leave a detail log on decision for improvement later

What you have written down on the paper can be kept as a valuable reference for later improvement. Many times when you look at this log again, you will find that it is really unnecessary to get into such a bad situation and there is always a better way out. At the same time, we can also become more confident on ourselves because we have changed ourselves to get a relative better decision and taken actions according to it.

Extended reading:
how to Develop a Positive Attitude;
How to conquer temper tantrum towards your lover - a practical way;
a good attitude towards bad temper control;
child temper control

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