A Smooth Pregnancy

It is common greeting among people to ask each other how are they when meeting, but when you are pregnant there is a meaning beyond the courtesy question: they really are enquiring to know how you are since so many things can happen during the joyous but possibly delicate state of pregnancy. The ...It is common greeting among people to ask each other how are they when meeting, but when you are pregnant there is a meaning beyond the courtesy question: they really are enquiring to know how you are since so many things can happen during the joyous but possibly delicate state of pregnancy. The question how are you then refers to both, mother and baby and estate of health in general, such as energy levels, blood pressure, back ache and any other likely imbalances.

But to the astonishment of those who know me, not only they usually remark that I seem to be in a permanent state of glow since I got pregnant and that it is incredible that I seem to be fine whenever they ask.

Apart from some little cramps in the lower part of my belly (where the uterus is stretching) and a pinch in my right lower rib (which apparently, according to the doctor, is the floating rib expanding) I am very happy to say that so far, 17 weeks into the pregnancy, so good.

Yes, of course, you do get some days when you feel down for no apparent reason or some days when you are tired without actually doing anything, just existing! But not anything different from before becoming pregnant! And while I used to attribute these body and emotional up and downs to hormones, at least now I have an obvious excuse: the immense amount of internal work that my body is going through.

After so many years of working on my own personal development, I have come to understand not only that everything happens for a reason, but that accepting reality as it is, though it may require humility and insight, is in the long run a much better choice than fighting things as they are because we would like them to be different. It takes enormous effort to open one’s heart and feel compassion for yourself when your mind tells you that it makes no sense or it’s illogic, but your still feel as you do. So when I am tired, as simple as it sounds, I stop and rest, even if it is for a short while, and when I am hungry, I stop and eat, even if it is a snack.

When I feel sad, I don’t fight myself and think don’t be silly and get on with your chores and responsibilities. No. I just stop and allow myself to be sad, even if it is for 10 minutes. Because what I am saying to my body is that it has a right to feel sad, whether I understand the reasons or not, at that point, and I honour it by acknowledging this sadness and stopping to feel whatever my body is trying to communicate to me at that moment. Sometimes the moment goes and I am nothing the wiser, but it doesn’t matter because the fact is that I was working within my integrity of feeling and respecting my body’s estate of mind and spirit at that moment.

The same goes for any other feeling or emotion that may arise. This is a way for me to stay in touch with whatever is going inside without expecting or saying I don’t have time for you right now, I am busy, I have other very important things to do.
Because really, what is there more important in life that your inner peace and harmony?

I focus my attention on keeping myself balanced. I don’t get it right a lot of the time, but the intention is there and the more you are aware of how your body works, the easier it is to regain that state of calmness when for whatever external reason we are pulled out of our centre.

I am a Reiki Master and I have been practicing Reiki for about 8 years. I give myself daily Reiki before I go to sleep, on waking up and whenever I am sitting on the sofa relaxing or watching TV or any other situation of not doing. It has become a part of my routine and I always do it with love, knowing that all the minor little daily nagging symptoms disappear within 5 minutes and without the need to take tablets or medicines. Reiki contributes to this state of inner peace, well-being and harmony that others describe as glow or presence. I couldn’t do without it.

And because I am a Reiki Master and believe in energy, I can also send energy to any future or past moments I need to (in energy terms there are no boundaries – everything is connected, everything is a continuum of one eternal moment – the now) so I regularly prepare for the following month’s changes and even the birth of the baby so that it is as flowing and stress free as possible.

In fact, besides the pregnancy, I send Reiki to myself and others on a regular basis to any time or place I feel the energy is needed. It really is home-made energy medicine at its best and gives you a kind of control (if there is such a thing) or perhaps a better word would be a power to focus your intention in a way that the parts of your life can gel into integrity, rather than feeling that our lives are out of control and des-integrated (this is, broken into bits and dislocated, not together).

Nothing is for free in this life (well, air and water is… or at least should be!) and this apparent peace, strength and harmony do take work: time, love and dedication for yourself, which then can be passed to those around you (and in the case of pregnancy, inside you!). It is difficult enough to keep one’s body or energy field in harmony with the continuous bombardment of expectations and demands that bosses, colleagues, partners, children, family and friends make of us on a regular basis, so it is even more difficult when you are carrying a little being inside, growing at the speed of lightning, to keep the harmony of two energy systems which are trying to adapt to each other and get to know each other’s needs and limitations.

Listening to music, having a (not too hot) relaxing bath and reading a nice book, avoiding negative newspaper news, noisy TV or violent images all help to keep this inner sense of harmony. In a way, it is like building a small cocoon of your own where you can keep the rest of the world in the outside while you and your loved ones are in the inside. It is a place of safety where you can be who you are, without judgments or justifications.

I don’t consider this escaping or running away from reality (mainly because there is nowhere to go except in your mind!) but I do choose to live my life in my own terms, in a way that is nourishing and balanced. It may not be the way most people do it because in general we have (and have created) so many responsibilities in our daily lives that we hardly have time to breath, reconnect with ourselves and be present in our own life. Only family events such as weddings or funerals bring sometimes home the realisation of how much time has passed by and the unnerving question where has my life gone.

And because I realise that we are here today but we don’t know for sure whether we have a tomorrow, then I choose to spend time with myself and my loved ones in the most balanced possible way today, while I have time, rather than stress myself by juggling one thousand and one tasks each moment of the day and having the awful feeling that my life doesn’t belong to me.

The way I see it, you are only pregnant with this baby once, so missing on this incredible miracle and the joy that it gives me seems crazy. Life is precious. There is no bigger gift than this. We think that we need so many things to make us happy but if we stop and feel we will realise that only these precious moments with our loves ones, including ourselves, are what really make life worth living.

If we look right inside ourselves we will realise that we really don’t need so many things and that we really need love in order to grow and be happy.

And love is one of the free gifts available. Take time to stop and feel it; do what you need to find these moments. Give it to yourself and your unborn baby and it will radiate out with the force of what really matters: life.