From the book "Contemporary Parables"
by Robert Elias Najemy

Some of us prefer to hide our problems from ourselves and others. Because it is too painful to deal with them, we lock them up in our subconscious mind and pretend that these problems or feelings do not exist and that all is fine.

When some stimulus or inner searching brings us into contact with these old covered up but actually very active and certainly not-yet-healed wounds, we seek to avoid facing these old situations. We say, «don’t dig up old problems». «Let them be». «I just feel worse when I think about them».

This may be true. It may be painful. But it is more painful and always will be because we refuse to look at and heal these old and festering wounds. Hiding them within our subconscious, and pretending that they are not there will not heal them. There is a large difference between hiding (suppressing) something and overcoming (transcending) it. We will know that we have overcome a previously painful situation when we can remember it and talk about it without feeling any negativity at all. As long as we feel unpleasant feelings when we remember or talk about an incident or situation, then it is still an open wound within us which we have not yet surpassed.

What we are trying to do is similar to someone discovers that there is a fire in his basement, but because it is too painful to face it at this moment, he prefers to close the door so as not to be bothered by the smoke and pretends that there is no fire at all.

How much time will pass before the fire will spread to all the house destroying it completely?

Our hidden painful experiences are like this fire, and basement is our subconscious mind. By locking the door to the subconscious we lock the fire in and pretend that it is not there. It gradually permeates, however, all aspects of our life without our realizing it. It undermines our health, creating psychosomatic illnesses and we cannot understand why our immune system is weak and unable to protect us. The reason is that it is worn out from trying to contain the «inner fire».

This hidden fire makes us overly sensitive to people’s remarks and selfishness. We easily feel hurt, upset, insecure or fearful. All this because the fire is burning within our inner rooms, subconsciously distorting our every reality. We destroy our relationships fighting about small and petty matters, because these subconsciously remind us of that unfinished, unresolved, unhealed wound.

So let us begin to open that door little by little and put out that fire with the cool healing water of truth, love and acceptance for ourselves
exactly as we are.

Author's Bio: 

Robert Elias Najemy, a life coach with 30 years of experience, has trained over 300 Life coaches and now does so over the Internet. Info at: http://www.HolisticHarmony.com/introholisticcoach.asp
He is the author of over 20 books, 600 articles and 400 lecture cassettes on Human Harmony. Download FREE 100's of articles, find wonderful ebooks, guidance, mp3 audio lectures and teleclasses at http://www.HolisticHarmony.com .
His books The Psychology of Happiness, Remove Pain with Energy Psychology and six others are available at http://www.amazon.com